My mom and Dad called me at 6:30 this morning and asked me "are you even trying to get better?" And the only thing I could say was "I'm working on it."
Like I don't know what the hell "better" means. Is it being the old fake perfect me? Going to church every week? Smiling and laughing at the right times?
Is that "better"?
Mom I don't even remember ever feeling good so I don't know how you expect me to get there.
People don't want to hear that you're struggling. They want to hear that you are getting better and if you are not getting better then you might as well just hurry up and die. Stop wasting their time.
Idk that's really dark and ******* up.
I'm just venting.