You're a ****
Most times I dig you out of the earth
The dirt gets under my fingernails, my heart beats fast because I dont want anyone to see-
And to think I'm a murderer.

But when I'm weak,
I water you
I pretend you're not there but I'll watch you out of the corner of my eye

Are you growing?
Is the sun treating you we-
No
Stop.

I'll ruin myself. Stop asking questions, stop giving attention.
I pluck you out again.

But you always come back.
I've planted other seeds.
I've gone months without looking at you.
I don't love you.

Stop filling my head and choking my tiny thoughts.

I'm sick of you.