The holidays masquerade as
simple and sweet,
the affectionate smell
of freshly baked cookies,
melted chocolate and
a minty breeze,
The fantasy of something white,
and lights, lights
so many lights.

But up close it's
nothing more than
tension, poorly masked
by contrived small talk.
No politics.
No religion.
And don't talk about anything
that matters.
Guilt at the pit of my stomach,
in a small room
with too many people,
too many inauthentically polite people.
And a clock,
A clock that won't stop ticking
for just a moment,
to let me breathe.