I feel I'm getting sad again
I don't know how to scare it away
and I'm sick of it coming back

it's like a monster that hides it's way inside
and comes out when life becomes lonely and difficult
I had come so close to making it all the way back
and then I was hurt again by friends

so the sadness is returning
and my chest feels small and cold

but he makes me laugh
makes me giggle like a child
I just want to open up
but I am ugly and twisty on the inside
my ribs are made of barbed wire
and my heart has grown callouses

I look at my own body in the mirror
and what once was voluptuous again
has slowly become the skeleton I knew a year ago

I don't know what to do
I don't want to try to be happy
it's not so easy
I just want it to happen for me
please!!
just this once!
please!!