I have
never been
an easy girl to love.
Because
I once thought that
everyone
disliked me as much as
I
disliked
myself.

When Jordan
asked me to be his girlfriend on the playground
in fifth grade,
then followed with
I'm just kidding, I could never date a fat girl
I thought
right then
that those words meant my
body
was
incapable
of
even
being
accepted.

But now,
as your fingers sweep over my bare skin
in the flickering light of
our
coffee scented candle,

I realize just
how
wrong
I
was.