I get so confused when I think
because I'm so hungry but I
about recovery. Sometimes I want
don't want to eat, or because
it so badly, and other times
I ate and I wasn't suppose to an once
I do not fight the urges at
I get inside I know I have to
all. I use to limit myself to
get rid of it all. Have to. Some
certain times and specific places.
nights it's me kneeling on the
Obviously we went past that line
bathroom floor, rocking back and forth
ages ago. Sorry. I want to be
holding my head in my hands
normal so badly. I don't like
because I'm trying to silence the
having anxiety that makes me
voice screaming insults and telling
Shake after I eat. I don't like
me to do what I hate doing.
not feeling safe in my house
Maybe I don't hate it as much
to the point that I just sit
as I'd like to say. I've lost weight
in my car for hours before
and I love that more than I hate
finally entering. It's always
the burn of acid and empty ache.
different too. Sometimes it's