I awoke this morning before the dawn.
You were gone.
You forgot to turn the coffee-maker on.
Ai.

r ~ 4/30/14

I know you're tired
But come, Love, this is the way.
You've endured too much.

I want to put you back together again
Piece by piece.
I want the struggle of not knowing where things go
And i want the victory of finally making you whole.
But you are more than just a game
You are the shattered fragments of a glass vase
That i vowed to return back to its original state before mother gets home.
You are the superglue sticking to my fingers making this messier than it should be.
You are that small shard of glass i stepped on after i thought i picked up everything.
You are my constant reminder to breathe.
You are my constant reminder of battle.
You we my constant reminder of time.

caffeine makes me feel like ****
but today i'm chugging it
focus on the negativity in my cup
so the positives don't put me too high up

happy is just how far from the ground you are
happy is just how far you'll fall
how hard you'll hit
the pavement
i'd rather be an inch high
than on a cliff
is it worth
the self interest

A broken leg floats
After its bones sink,
yellow turns red
turns white turns pink,

sweet turns black
turns sour turns rotten,
It turns in its grave
it bangs in its coffin,

Coffee beans are chopped
and bought from them,
turned hot and then forgotten,
Turned cups flow their drink
toward the waste,

It waits in the **** and under the bandage,
based in the wound and under the scabbing,
It's soon to fall off and show us a scar,
It's color is pink, It's over the raw.

I remember a day,
when the clouds were illuminated,
by a bright pink sky...
everything that seemed important,
just melted away,
and in a stare:
innocence resurfaced,
and was joined by joyous curiosity,
all due to the beauty of
a sky that was pink...
cotton candy over the
dull apartment buildings,
pink lemonade in the sky,
even made smoke stacks pause in awe,
games were stopped,
shovels were dropped,
and collectively we stared,
wide-eyed, smiling brightly,
and all at once,
we reached out to grab a piece,
trying to hold onto its beauty,
but eventually...
black replaced pink,
indifference replaced joy,
acceptance replaced innocence,
and the cotton candy/pink lemonade,
became bitter black licorice,
that not even the man in the moon
could eat.

I lay there waking
Ever sleeping
Ever simply dreaming

For simple dreams
Do seem quite real
When upon waking, sleeping

And what's to say
That when you sleep
You do not also wake

Some strange world
Among strange worlds
That is our own to make.

So when you sleep
Or when you dream
Or always while awake

Or when you see the other worlds
That you think your mind makes.
What is real and what is not
Depends on what's at stake

So dream a dream upon a dream
And make what you will make
Sleep while you're awake.