I'm happier now, I used be really sad.
I used to only write sad things, but now it triggers me when others are depressed like me.
To hear the pain a young women silently endures.
I want to tell everyone it takes time and all the things that helped me but it never seems to stick with them.
It wasn't all at once, it was day by day, one at a time.
Sometimes we aren't ready for help, pain is comfortable and all you know.
You gotta get to rock bottom before you are ready to grow.

I can't stop thinking about her
I don't want to decide whether to distance myself or get closer
All I want to do is spend time with her.
All I want to do is love her but all she can do is be a friend.
I'm okay with it, as much as I can be.
My heart is conflicted and broken,
She let's me love her from an arms length but I want to know her inside and out.
I want to love her. And I do.

It's painful to love her and know the feeling isn't the same.
My chest is empty and all I can do is shed a tear for what will never be.
Even so I keep hoping but I know
That she's not ready and I respect that
Life has a path for us all and I'm just glad ours crossed.

I've been having dreams
Where all I do is cry
All I can remember is the overwhelming sadness making my face into rivers
The strangest thing is
I'm not unhappy when I'm awake
But it leads me to believe I
Am hiding something
From myself

ive last felt so low
and i don't remember that time,
but i do sure recall the heavy feeling of all the dirt on top
of my metaphorcal grave
and this heart burn won't be helped by the liquor
but i guess this is how i hurt myself now

It's been a week of you here, the week I get off of school.
I had a week of vacation with you, but now I feel like a I need a week of vacation with me.
Don't get me wrong, I love spending time with you, and I got to do that all this week.
I just get tired and worn out being around people all the time.
So I need some me time, some Kathleen time.

Sometimes I wonder why I try to please anyone, but then I remember the things you do. I remember that relationships are a give and take, a push and pull of emotions. I just want to be loved, and often I wonder if you do. And that's why I get tired of loving you.

Do you hate me because I tell you what you do wrong? Do you resent me because I am here? Do you think I don't love you? Do you know when I'm feeling like this? It's funny that it makes me feel almost nothing anymore, I am getting used to the pain and it's not good. It's not something I want, it's a sting in my throat, a sting like boiling heartburn. But my heart is freezing, and you are the cold.

It's not burning, I wish you would...I wish you would do something. I wish it could be better, I wish I wasn't like this. I wish I could leave and not regret it. It seems that the ones we love shouldn't hurt us, but it's them that hurt us the most. And here I sit in continued silence, and here I sit wondering what to do, what to say, and how to say it. And here I sit, wondering if I should be the bigger person, or if I should go low and be myself. Here I sit wondering if I should ice you out until you thaw me out, it seems to always come back to me wondering what I have to do to get attention.

I know you're there and I'm here
Length and distance is the same thing, but space is different.
The space between us is nil, but the distance seems smothering.
I wish you lived on the other side of my bed, and I could wake you up to take a late night ride with me.
Kisses could be your wake up call everyday.
Our children could be my feathery babies.
I'd go to school and you could do your crazy binary math.
But that's not the reality of it
And we have to do these things on our own time, far away from one another
But the circles of metal around our fingers and the love between us keep us close.