I spend hours each day
doubled over the toilet,
spewing feelings
anger
     sadness
                 tears streaming
                                          down my
                                     face
                 worthlessness
all flushed
out of my mind and down the drain,
until next time

I want to know when you stopped smiling when you heard my name
When you began to not care how I was doing all the time
When I stopped crossing your mind at the end of the day
I want to know why

I want to know why
I began to cry at the sound of your voice
Why you crossed my mind twice as much
Why I began to fall