My hand in yours
Your hand on mine.
The touch of your soft lips,
Touching mine, gently.

What a crazy time that one-night stand was,
It'd sure be great for the night to never end.
Sitting there with you.

Sitting here without you,
I've never wanted to cry in agony so bad..
If only you were here..
My life would be complete...
And we'd never leave..
Hand in hand.

The willow tree,
Sits on the moon.
The center of the moon.
And it's roots extend to the other side.
Poor willow tree....
It's so lonely.
Being the only source of life on the moon.

The poor willow tree,
Sits on the moon.
The center of the moon...
Alone

In your cry I hear.
Such painless tears.
Hidden in such pain.
No crying eyes lay upon your tear-stained face.
If I could be here without you,
Forever I would.
I want to your terrific cry, cry again.
I don't want you living that pain again.
All your whole dang life.
I'm pretty sure nobody would tolerate such a life.
Let me hear your terrific cry, cry again.

A strange
Upon my characteristic life.
Lying to my face, he was.
Didn't know the name or the curtsy he bowed.
But he said he had to go to work everyday,
No. He was cheating upon the whole town.
Nobody knew until he came to the truth.
And nobody ever came to a truce.
What a strange change upon the young life.
A change,
I recall
Upon her poor heart.

Children running towards such greatness,
Adults slowly backing away to much darkness.
As we began to breathe we thought
such light was beautiful; as we start to age
we do nothing but think of it as evil.
Can we make up our indecisive minds about what
is wrong and what is right; about what is
dark and what is light; what is good and the bad?

As our bones grow up strong, science proves that
they are meant to die weak. Because
even if we die by a hit and run or a crashing bike,
then our bones are meant to break; we will fight for
our lives on the edge of a death we do not want.
If it's life we do not wish for, and we are on the
brink of giving up, then life we shan't have
and we will die like a present under the
family's outrageous Christmas tree, a present
too large for Santa to fit under its leaves.
Because on the edge of the unseen cliff, we
know that we won't go down without a fight,
but we understand and don't understand the meaning of
"sticks and stones may break my bones,
but words will never hurt me."

Sierra,

You're my sister,

And if you're hurt,

And you're in the hospital I think I might just have to conquer my fear.

I've been lost lately,

And I can tell from the last time I saw you,

You've been lost too.

I'm sorry all I could do was make you laugh and smile,

And it might not have been real laughter or smiling,

But you don't deserve the pain you're going through,

And if I could I'd **** all the pain from you and unto me.

Because I think I deserve it more than you.

You've always been there to listen,

You've always been there to free my spirit,

And I'm sorry I never thanked you.

I always did listen to what you had to say..

And I'm sorry philosophical advice was all I could give you.

I remember our funnest memories and our bad memories




Naming the trampoline, Fernanand of course.

Always searching for resources

All the little tea parties we used to have.

Jumping on Fernanand with the sprinklers on and listening to Bon Jovi and screaming the lyrics at the top of our lungs.

Sleeping on Fernanand , getting eaten alive by misquitoes.

Sitting under the mushroom at the public kiddy pool.

Seeing all those shadows,

Sharing deep dark secrets.

Our first meeting.

Setting notes under the house mats like we were spies.

Playing tip the cow on Fernanand.

Crying together.

Funny make overs

Sharing books,

Being ourselves.

Being sisters




Our bad memories...




Our fights

Moving ...

And when you're hurt,

I hurt too.




I don't know why you got this pain,

I did not.

When I deserve it more,

Than you.

You,

My dearest friend Sierra.

You did nothing.

Would you still hurt,

If we were together,




Sierra

I wish I could help.

I wish I could come visit you

But I don't think you'd like it if I had to commit ****** in a hospital to do that.

We are attached by soul chains

If you snap,

I will snap with you.

Do me a favor and don't snap.

Never give up..

Shoot for the stars...

Cry when you need to...

Write when you want....

Just because you're in that room,

Does not mean you cannot achieve your dreams.




Your description...

Just a girl following her dreams...




You're more than that..

You're my inspiration achieving her dreams.




We will never lose each other...

you cry, I cry.

You hurt, I hurt.




You don't deserve this pain...

I do...

Sierra..

My dearest friend..

My dearest sister...

My closest friend...

My closest sister....

Please understand..

If I could come and save you,

I would....




To all the world's best, You're the best...

Never forget...

Sierra...

I love and miss you...

And I hope to see you soon..

Broken useless.
Cheaters.
Broken Hearts.
Everything in the world .
Are made from love weapons.

People that use love weapons are **** bags!
Sorry to those who use them

If everything were to revolve around one topic it'd be the unknown
Because that is the unexplored land we humans have yet to uncover and discover.
Think of it as a newly discovered Hawaii island.
Or a strange city that came out of nowhere because only certain people can walk it's streets.
Or an old forgotten castle.
A photo album that was never known to anyone in the family.
A memory that you had sought to dig out from the back of your mind.
Not us humans nor any living thing can seek out the unknown.
So the unknown is unknown to everyone and everything.

A list of things I don't seem to know about,
Is huge.
The list I don't care about,
is short.
I'm not only too nice,
but too gentle to say I can't not give a crap.
Sometimes,
I wish I could say.
Things I'm not going to mention.
For my heart is too small and caressed by a hand.
A hand invisible to the naked eye.
My heart creaks for such untouchable desire.
My list of things I don't know,
can't be named.
My list of things I don't care about.
I care about everything.
So it's small.

Slivering through the star-covered sky,
Crazing down at you in your sleep,
Telling it's story,
As it's supposed to go,
Hogging your fate,
Otherwise,
Sharing your destiny,
Like you don't exist completely,
Nobody knows your secrets,
But everyone knows your future,
Let the shining moon tell you your flying
Stars.

I went through the trouble of putting you two guys together,
And now you guys are screaming at me.
What the heck did I do deserve the screaming?!
You guys are insane!
I thought you loved each other!
Stop screaming at me!
CURSED LOVE!!!!

My sudden urge,
To punch him in the face.
My sudden,winning,urge.
To let my past burdens consume me.
Bury me alive
In my own tears.
It won't happen.
I won't let it.
I'm strong.
I'm intelligent.
I'm strategic.
I'm terrified.
But my urges won't win.
This unexpected battle.

My days without you sadden me.
I walk alone on the sandy beach.
I lay on the soft green grass of the spring.
Staring at the stars.
Wondering if I made the right choice.

Everyday my mind goes astray.
My grades go from A's to D's.
Then, I start to ask myself,
did I really make the right choice?
But now that my head is straight,
my answer is no.

Walking on the sandy beach
with you every morning is like,
recreating the love that we once had.

Laying on the ground with you,
staring at the stars reminds me of our first date.

Every time I think of you my grades become A's.
  And everyday I ask myself was our time together something that worth fighting for.
And you know what? "Without you my life is like a broken pencil,
pointless."

On the prowl
In the park swings.
We swing.
The whole town turns
back to 1823
Every moonlight hour.

Apart from everything.
The air rains from the sky.
With thunder bolts hitting hard.
Turning into total destruction.
Let us come together for this broken sky.

I don't know what happened..

You've got me confused..

You got rid of my love for you..

So now are you happy?

You got rid of my happiness..

So are you really happy?

Are you ready to feel my anger and hatred that's ready for you?

I'm sorry I won't let go.

I won't let you go.

I can't get rid of the love.

I can't get rid of the hatred..

For now..

You're just an aquantience..

Something that's hanging by a thread.

I know how to control.

I know how to choose.

I won't come after you.

But now can you see..

I've changed.

I hope you will have

Changed by the next time I see you too.





This anger..

This sadness..

This confusion..

This frustration..

These bottled up emotions are supposed to be eating me from the inside to the out.

But..

Well..

I've changed..

I won't be manipulated.

I've got things I need to live to solve.

I've got things that are important to me.

I've got things that I care about that the likes of you just wouldn't understand.

Because you're a person who hurt me.

You hurt me the most.

I think..

I know who you are now.

You're the other side of me.

My one weakness.

The other half.

My missing piece.



Wait...



You didn't hurt me the most.

I don't think I know who you are.

I know who you are.

You are my weakness of weaknesses.

You aren't my other half.

You aren't my missing piece.

I'll crush you to pieces and use you as crust for a pie I've got stow away.

I'll crush you smitherenes so you'll never reverbeat inside me again.

Because ..

I'm living for the things I've done.

For the sins I cannot repent..

For the sins I can't bring myself to forget..And to regret.

For the things I've said.

And for the things I've thought.

And for the things I care about the most.

....



.....

...

Honestly..

Haven't you noticed by now?...

I've changed.

Once I'm down,

I always come back up.




Once underwater,

I always revive myself




Once crying

I always smile




Once sad,

I can get happy again




Things happen for a reason,

And I can't let go,

Because I can't lose hope.

Hope is by my side,

It has never lied

It has never let me die.

I will be the first to cross the finish line

My end is no where near

I can't let go of her soft hands,

She is my inspiration,

My heart,

And my sister,

No matter the game of twister,

I won't let anyone diss her.




She helps keep me alive,


She gives me my hope,

I will never let go,

It's the least I can do.




Hope,

You're always by my side,

You have never lied,

You have never let me die,

And I thank you for always being my guide.




Hope,

You're always by her side,

You have never lied,

You have never let her die,

And I thank you for always being her guide.

His big blue eyes.
Teary and sad.
His fluff of brown hair.
Upon that tiny head.
But his life has been given.

What a pretty face.

He squirms, squeals, sniffles, and screams.
Let's let God let him be.
For this new born child has such a pretty face.

When you lie you're
not telling the truth.
They say "honesty is the best policy."
I can't say that always.
Telling the truth can start fights.
Can get you into danger.
There's sometimes you have to lie.
When you have no choice,
but to protect the ones you love.
Can we just do both.
You can lie and tell the truth at the same
time.
Let's just do what we want.
Let's just not start fights.
Let's just not start danger.
Because you can lie and you won't even know it.
And you can be honest and not even know it.
So what's the difference whether we lie or not?
It's to protect ourselves and the ones' we love.
Let's just follow our hearts.
And let us tell us what to do.

Telling the truth can;
get you in fights,
and start danger.
But it can help you too.

Telling lies can;
get you into fights,
and start danger,
fix fights,
fix danger.
But it can help you oh so many other ways.

So let's just do what we want.
Let's just get away with it .
Are we lies or the truth?
It wouldn't matter.

Stars aligned once in the sky.
Watching the moon move in the sky.
What a beautiful sight.
That happened that night.
And we still carry the unforgettable memories.

A cry I hear.
Over the mountain top.
Nothing particularly special about that certain night.
But we cherish the unforgettable memories.

Carried in a bag.
Across the world.
So full of emotions.
But yet not screaming but still breathing.
What bad memories.
But it's all that happened that make it an unforgettable memory.

You're not going away.
Nor are you flying away.
You are also not driving away.
Walking away.
running away.
Nor are you falling into the dark and empty shadows of the night.
You're not leaving.
You're not just going to disappear.
And you're not going to reappear.
But you're going to fade away.
As the clock ticks you think you still have awhile.
But humans aren't like cats that have 9 lives.
Humans have 1 life.
Humans spend on alcohol.
On drugs.
On words.
On contracts.
And even on other humans they don't love.
They spend on just random unrealizable things.
But the way I choose to spend mine is up to me.
I choose.
To be free like a bird.
And to watch me hit a twenty story high window and fall, fall down.
Until I hit the ground.
I want to watch my clock tick and tick away.
As the seconds fly on by.
Minute by minute.
Hour by hour.
Day by day.

I'm here to watch your life too.
Just don't be like me.
And be so lazy to get up in the morning.
Don't be like me.
And do something more entertaining with your life.
I'm here to watch my beak and body crack and shatter and not leave a piece behind for you to pick up.
I'm here. Like you. For a short time.  Watch your clock wisely. And don't spend it thinking what you're going to do.  Spend it on doing something.

I watch my love petals

from my love flower

drop, drop, drop to the floor.

I try to catch them,

But they fade and fall through my hand



I know that if I catch them,

Then I die,

But you'd live.

That's all I need right now.

You'd take my place





Last thing I know I'm holding the last

Love Flower Petal

And everything fades,

Everything goes black..







And I see flaming red flames ahead..

I took the wrong road,

By loving you.



I go straight through the flames of hell,

And see light,

With the Sun's face

Wearing your eyes.

Love Flower Petal

Falls through my hand...

Love Flower is gone..

You are gone..

I am here...

Waiting for the day you finally see

I risked my life

For you



They drop, drop, drop to the floor,

Through my hand,

In your splattered pool of screeching red blood.

Roses may bloom
Daisies will die in Winter
Cherry Blossoms may not come true
Irises will open wide
Let me see the flower petals falling

To blame someone;
know their story.
To that of treachery;
is a deadly sin.

Do you blame someone?
Once upon a star.
Do you blame her?
Shooting silver lights.
Is there a reason?
On the dark and rainy night.
Can you blame her?
To test my strength.
Could you blame her?
And my weaknesses.
Will you blame her?
My kindness fled over.
Why? Because of your puny power you call courage and sensitivity?
Cover my eyes.
Why? Why do you choose to lay your guilty life onto her?
Because she's the one who made me who I am. But thinks me with such base thoughts.
Do you wish?
Do I wish what? That my flailing end will come to reach me at any moment? That her dark hole of controversy will pull my into a story? Do I have someone to blame? To tell my individual story? To read it's painless points? to rate my conversations?  To make my day when everything is wrong?
No. I never wish upon a star. The first falling cherry blossom of the season.The hare shaped cloud of the year.

To blame someone else;
know their story.
And to that of treachery;
is a harmful sin.

I feel a little terrified..

I don't know of what..

But for the past day or so I haven't been feeling right.

Not like I'm sick..

But just like..

I need to run away soon.



I don't know why..

And it's freaking me out.

How do I get this feeling to run away itself?

It's the first time it's happened.

I'm afraid that if I don't get rid of it..

It's going to destroy me from the inside to the out..

Have I always felt this way and never realized it?

Why am I so terrified?!

What am I terrified of?!

I now know..

It's not a who..

And there isn't a why..

It's a what..

I'm terrified of..

My mirror's reflection of my empty personality

My body filled with 5 memorable scars

I'm terrified.. of ..

Myself..

Her scream for help,
echoes in the hallway.
Her tears raining down her pain shattered face.
Don't you hurt her anymore.
Don't you make her cry a tear more.
If you do.
She will never be in your trust ever again.
I will be there for her until the very end.
Until her last tear is shattered across her tear-stained cheek.
With every ounce of greatness this girl holds,
You make her doubt she will live longingly.
Make her creases of paper unfold.
Let her come away and get back.
I won't have time to say goodbye.
I will have to come and forget her pack.
Don't make her screams for help echo on the hallway walls ever again.
Don't make her have a tear streaked-stained face.
Let me fix her pouring tears and screams.

Don't tell me through texts,

Don't tell me in letters,

I want to hear your voice tell me

Through wind,light,sky, and stars.

A gift belongs to a dream..

Not me.

Has anyone ever told you..

That you are are their hero..

Their lover...

Their gift that belongs to a dream?



I won't share you

With the deep, blue sea..

I wanna hear you singing to me through my subconscious mind.

Tell me everything I wanna hear.

Like..

Maybe..

I'm not like anyone else..

I'm not as pretty as I look.

Maybe my personality could use some editing.



I won't share you with any other girl

You will be here in my dreams..

For you were gifted to me...

Through my dreams..

You're a gift that belongs to a dream..

And that dream belongs to..

Me.

Forever.

A faint,
Upon your lips.
So soft and delicate.

A word,
I read.
A faint whisper or cry.

I hear
A titled word.

I wander about your land of haunting, ghostly fathom.

Honey,
There's no reason.
No reason to be sad.
No reason to be mad.
No reason to feel anything at all.

Why is there no reason?

There just isn't a reason, ***.
There's not a reason at all.
No reason.
No reason to be glad I'm here.
No reason to be sad I'm there.
No reason to be mad that I came.

Just what are you feeling then?
You're feeling the hatred just grow and grow,
but it's not for me.
That feeling you think you feel
has no reason until you know that feeling is real.
No reason that the feeling is there until you
realize that it can't exist until you know it's
real, so more emotions can come out.

Let the feelings show on your face.
Shine in the sunlight or shimmer in the moonlight.
Just show the face of what you feel.
And you can live just fine.

Just make sure you have a reason to know the feeling is mutual.

I hurt her...
Didn't mean too..
Just wanted to get my feelings through to her..
I hurt someone I cared about once again....
Why?
Why do I always hurt the people I love?...

I don't remember anything
My childhood.
I only have these short flashbacks.
Maybe what I see is a dream,
that can't be.
It has to be true.

My past,
Must have went good.
In a way I'm happy I don't remember it,
that way I can't live in the past except with a running memory.
Running it's laps with it's infinite breath on it's never-ending track.

I live:
Not to make regrets,
so he is not a regret.
He's my savior.
In a certain way.

In a way through my heart,
he left a sorrow,
an undependable sorrow that burdened my shoulders.
It felt like a million pounds on my weak back,
bending and breaking.
But then I took note,
I've probably never been more alive in my life,
why am I standing here crying?
Why am I wasting my time yearning for something I don't need to go back for.
I live- Not to make regrets.
I live- In the present not the past.
My past
Is not my future,
My past is not,
my present.

You know the meter at the carnival?
When the guy hits the pad with the hammer and the weight makes the bell ring?
Imagine a bell one hundred times higher than that...
Imagine the meter as a meter that measures a person's difference..

The beginning of the show,
Is the end of a fall..
Make it meet your difference..

The crack in a wall..
Is the seal on an envelope.
Open up wide.

The light on a shadow..
Makes the shade..
Show your light..

You know the meter at the carnival?
When the guy hits the pad with the hammer and the weight makes the bell ring?
Imagine a bell one hundred times higher than that...
Imagine the meter as a meter that measures a person's difference..

Love is all that I can see

Between you and me.

I wanna cross street

My hand curled around your gentle finger.

Feel the softness of your lips.

Take me underwater for me to see.

You and me.

L.

O.

V.

E

Love is all that I can see

I wanna cross streets

Not shedding any tears

I wanna hug you tight

And watch the sky way up high

With you

L.

O.

V.

E.

Love is all that I can see

A current flow

Of you and me.

L.O.V.E

Love...

Is all that I can see...

Between you and me.



A stream connects somehow, somewhere to a river

A river connects to the shining sea.

A sea connects to the Ocean

The Ocean

Connects

YOU AND ME..

L.

O.

V.

E.

Love..

You've been gone.
For two years now.
Never came back.
I don't know where you went.
I don't know what you went for.
Is there something you chased after?
What time does your clock say now?
When are you coming back?

I've missed having you here.
To comfort me when I'm down.
To play scrabble with.
To play basketball with.
To argue about politics with.
So why aren't you here?
Why are you where ever you went?
I've never left the house without you.
And I can't turn around and forget
you.
Can you come back please?
When are you coming back?


Is there something you chased after?
What time does your clock say now?
When are you coming back?
Can you come back please?

When are you coming back?
  
I'll just chase you down.
Tackle you when I find you.
If you died I'll sleep on your grave every night.
I'll dream of you every night.
Just come back from your mysterious world that you entered,
exactly 2 years ago.

Why aren't you coming back?
When are you coming back?

Crying on the kitchen floor

Wishing she was here

Is not the life she wanted for you.



Put out the cigar and throw away the alcohol

Take a walk



Pack your bags, pick up the baby,

And sell this dump.

Sell the place,

Where it happened...

Where everything happened.

And run away..



Just have your time to cry,

and follow your dreams.

Raise that baby girl strong.



Years pass and you're having a rough time,

You go to a night bar.

You call for the bartender to order a beer.



You start walking about call for a taxi.

You check your cell phone for the time.

It's dead.

You have a voice-mail,

but no calls.

The voice-mail is from Heaven.



You are crying too much,

It's making her sad.

She hasn't moved for three years.

She calling for you..



She calls you on the same day,

Two years later.

This time you answer.

She says it's her from Heaven.

She wants you  up here with her.



It's your baby's fifth birthday..

That morning you have a stroke.

While she's running to phone she collapses.

With the operator of Heaven on the phone.

You want to live,
In a collage.
You want to die,
In a painting.
You want to cry,
In a photograph.
You want to smile,
In a song.
You want to laugh,
In a smile.

You want to live,
In a collage.

Him
Was once I always thought about.
He never left my mind.
If he did he always came back.

Him
He totally got me.
Totally understood how different I was.
He liked it.

Him
He left my life,
I deleted him,
Everything I had from him,
Except my emotions.
Any love I consumed,
I rejected.

He.
Made me realize that
Love can be made from emptiness.
Love can form from being friends.
But it's difficult to consume the love in his eyes I feel even now.

He.
Maybe he will come back and see me.
Meet the new me.
Not so sensitive.
So much more confident than I once was.
So much more stronger physically and mentally.
And see the lifeful life I live now.
And see the scars on my heart.
Left behind by

Him

I know I'm falling,
quickly, quickly dripping dripping...
Leaking, lacking, losing...

All the sins that I've committed,
bodies piled up at my front door.
I can tell that Hell is welcoming,
calling; the home is quite enticing.

The failure getting worse,
the failing is failing;
life is completely scarce.
I'm leaving the world with many scars;
scathing, burning, burning, crashing, dying.

The skulls and feet- buried beneath one another,
like the ashes of the Holocaust.
The witnesses rare as daylight in a cave.

The flamed gates are creaking open,
rust catching in the forever red lust of evil.
The death of my deathly deeds awaken me,
chilling me, stating "you will now die,
and recede to deep depths of Hell,
while life above continues without you."
I realize that that my name is society,
and the I am a murderer readying for its
last, awaiting, final goodbye.

What a wretch you are,
For stabbing me in the back,
And twisting the poisoned blood,
Until it went through my rib cage.
What a wretched wretch you really are.

I am lost

Lost inside

Deep down..

I am dust

Dust inside your chamber of many broken

Hearts.

You've broken me over and over

Setting more and more weight

Upon

My poor soul..

She's been chained

To this poisoned wall of..

Your

Pitch

Black

Heart..




I am

Lost...

In

Your evil trance..

April,
    Amazingly different,
Thinks I've gone past the stage of insane.(I have)
                Slaps me on the head when I make a funny pun.
Is mentally insane, (She just doesn't know it.)
                                Tells me lots of things.
Think she's a female version of Benjamin Franklin.
                 Addicted to anything froggy.
                               N.

If there's nothing left in the world
Where would I be?
If there's not even love in the world
How would I feel?
If I can't love him because I don't know he exists anymore
How can I live?
How do I know the way others do.
I want to be normal
But that's not me.
My job for my heart at the moment is to be myself.
Not to blend in.
Just to be the only player in the outfield.

If there's a ***** loose
How do I tighten it?
If my feelings are hurt
Where can I go to get them healed?
Where are my feelings put after I die?
If death is the new beginning the is living the end?
Is it all an unending swirl of nothing that just makes this world, Earth?
Is there anything to be excited about?
What are emotions?

A center in the street
So obvious to point out
Tuck me into bed,
To ****** me in moonlight