I have no one to kiss at midnight for New Year's. Instead of complaining about it I can't help but imagine how fantastic it will be when I am able to kiss my future soulmate every year at midnight for the rest of my life and in that moment I will be so glad I waited to save my next kiss for someone who truly loves and appreciates me for who I really am

I want to think the creator of Hello Poetry Eliot York for allowing me to share my work on this site. To the other writers on this site both published and non published thank you for the critique to make my writing better. Thank you for encouraging me and directing me in the right direction to making my life more positive. Thank you for always motivating me and reminding me to work ******* my dreams. Thank you for picking me up when I was sad. Thank you for believing in me when I can't believe in myself. Thank you for taking time out of your day to read my poetry, like it, share it and compliment it. To the friends I have made on Hello Poetry thank you for being so awesome. I really hope to meet most of you in person so we can get together and write together. How cool would that be!!!?? I am so blessed to be able to share my work with people who understand how I think. For the first time in my life I have a place to turn to when I need release from all of the crap that builds up in my mind and to be surrounded by people who have a passion for writing like I do, it's like being around magic all of the time and I can't help but smile. To everyone on Hello Poetry thank you for not just making a difference in my life but for making a difference in other's lives as well through your words. You all make the world a better place. Every time you post a poem on this site, you are giving a gift of hope to those who are lost and each poem gives someone the courage to face their demons. If you ever feel like your words don't matter let me tell you now that they do. Every single day. So don't you ever think your work means nothing. You all are so talented and I am so blessed to be a part of a community that is just so full of love. 2015 was amazing and it was because of all of you. Eliot York, thank you again. To every writer on this site, thank you again for making the world a better place, one poem at a time. Happy New Year!!!!!!

She is not a *****
She is not heartless
She is not selfish
She is not full of herself
She is exhausted
She is worn out
She is done
She is tired of not being heard
She is tired of not being seen
She is tired of trying to be good enough
She is tired of having to take care of everything
She is tired of the late nights staying up worried about her loved ones
She is tried of disappearing and no one noticing her absence
She is tired of being taking advantage of
She is tired of giving advice yet when she needs advice no one seems to be around
She is tired of being disrespected
She is tired of being judged when she needs to be understood
She is tired of holding back because no one wants to hear about her problems
She is tired of being pressured into doing things she doesn't want to do
She is tired of being terrified to let people in
yet no one is giving her a reason to let her fear of vulnerability go
She is tired of working and not getting anywhere
She is tired of encouraging others but when she needs motivation
it's like she doesn't exist
She is tired of her kindness being walked all over
She is tired pushing forward just to be pushed back
She is tired of being everyONE'S HERO
SHE IS TIRED OF ALWAYS BEING THERE JUST TO BE LEFT BEHIND
SHE IS TIRED OF BEING TREATED LIKE SHE DOESN'T MATTER
SHE DOES MATTER
SHE IS A PERSON
SHE IS A GOOD PERSON
SHE TRIES SO HARD TO MAKE EVERYONE HAPPY BECAUSE SHE KNOWS WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE MISERABLE
SHE KNOWS WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE WALKED ALL OVER LIKE A BEAT UP PIECE OF CARPET
SHE PUTS OTHERS FIRST ALWAYS AND SHE GETS CHOSEN LAST
SHE IS TIRED OF IT
TIRED OF NOT GETTING WHAT SHE NEEDS
SHE NEEDS SOMEONE TO HOLD HER HAND FROM TIME TO TIME
SHE NEEDS TO HAVE A SHOULDER TO CRY ON
SHE NEEDS TO BE SEEN, TO BE HEARD, TO BE APPRECIATED
SHE IS A HUMAN BEING WHO NEEDS A HERO TOO
SHE IS...remarkable
Extraordinary
Beautiful
Talented
She is a rare person to find
She is everyone's hero but sometimes even hero's need help sometimes
Even hero's have bad days and just need someone to remind them of their greatness
She needed a hero
but now it's too late...

I hope you find happiness in places you never have before
I hope this Christmas you get everything you wished for
I hope you have the courage to let go of anything that is tragic
so you can spend today in peace as you fall back in love with magic




If you are reading this I just want to wish you a Merry Christmas!!!!

The snow is falling gently outside
the lights on the house are glowing with love
The Christmas tree is full of ornaments we made together
before God made you an angel above
The sky is dark yet full of stars
holiday movies play on the television
I sit outside with my cup of hot cocoa
hoping you can hear me from heaven
I wish you could see the house
it is decorated just for you
The mistletoe hangs where we used to kiss
as the clock strikes two
Your records stay in their place
just as you left them
I get sad knowing their collecting dust
but I don't have the heart to touch them
I tried making your famous pasta tonight
it's a recipe I can never get right
I drink the wine we used to share together
as we sat next to the window awaiting the winter weather
I still stay up until 2 am
hoping to catch Santa coming into the house
Yet I always manage to fall asleep
as I dream of you singing Beatles songs to me
I look through old photo albums
full of pictures from five Christmas's ago
I am immediately taken back to our first Christmas
where our first kiss took place in the snow
With tears in my eyes I grab the keys
to take a drive in your car
Merry Christmas my love
I hope your happy wherever you are



To those who are dealing with holiday grief I just want you to know that you are not alone. Merry Christmas. I hope your day is a wonderful one and I hope your heart is full of hope, love and happiness.

I am driving back to New Jersey
the holidays are now over
I am going to miss sleeping in your arms
and playing in the snow with you for hours
This long distance thing can be so annoying
but it is worth it every time I see you
I just wish we never have to part
because I hate being away from you
I am halfway through my drive
your face is all I keep thinking about
I will not see you for another thirty days
I do not think I can wait that long
I thought this long distance would be good for me
since I am so afraid to get close to anybody
Yet every goodbye makes you sad
and seeing you sad just kills me
A tear falls down my cheek
my heart is aching for you
I know my life is in New Jersey
but I belong in California with you
I quickly turn my car around
not giving a **** if other drivers on the road get ******
I am either all in or all out
I know longer want to be long distance

On Christmas Eve last year, I fell in love with a man who had a brain tumor. He was only given three months to live, but I didn't mind the short time we had together. He was brilliant, he was kind and despite his diagnosis he was adventurous. He didn't allow anything to hold him back. Most importantly, he didn't let his condition change him. Despite the frequent hospital trips, the headaches that never went away and the nausea he felt due to being in so much pain, he continued to laugh. He continued to be himself. He smoked his ****, he cooked his favorite meals. Whenever I tried to help him in any way he would always say "This may be the last time I do this so just let me be." I worried about him a lot but his smile and the choice he made to just live life to the fullest each day I had with him, was enough to make me forget he was sick. He didn't act like he was dying. Some people had a hard time believing he was sick and I think he wanted it that way. Three months came and went. He was still vibrant even though the fear that he might not wake up the next day was always hovering over him. We made it through Spring, Summer, and Fall. Before I knew it we were back in Winter making angels in the snow and getting high underneath the stars. It was Christmas Eve again. We had been together one whole year. The year I spent with that man was the most magical, scary and excruciating year I would ever go through. We spent our anniversary making love, baking brownies, decorating the Christmas tree and smoking **** outside as we watched the snow fall. That night we laid in bed holding hands staring up at the ceiling. He told me how grateful he was to meet me when he did. He said me that I was proof that just when life seems to fall apart, something extraordinary could happen when you least expect it. He thanked me for not treating him like a broken toy but a human being who wanted nothing more than to be normal. In that moment I told him how much I loved him and that my life would never be the same because the love he showed me despite his pain and suffering was the most beautiful, purest and rare love I had ever experienced. I told him that I would never let him be forgotten and that no man could ever take his place. We laid in bed for hours, telling each other back and forth how much we loved each other all the while still holding hands. At 6:13 a.m on Christmas Day, he passed away. I felt his hand gently grasp mine as he took his last breath. I knew that was coming but the pain I felt when I was certain he was gone was unlike anything I had ever felt. My heart broke into a million pieces as I squeezed his hand, hoping maybe his eyes would open up again. As I gained the courage to let go of his hand for good, I kissed him one last time and whispered "Merry Christmas" into his ear. I then thanked God for allowing me to fall in love and spend time with an angel, even if only for a year.