Is God who I turn to in order to feel safe?

He met her
and all the wars
inside him grow silent.

He loved her
and that's when he realized
she's the only thing
worth the pain of
****** hands, broken bones and bruised skin.

Cat calls choke my confidence
My responses aren't so strong  
Skirts always feel too short
Shirts always too long

Some say I was asking for it
Others say it was my clothes
I say it was a misfit
Letting lust fall like dominoes

So here I am stuck screaming
Black and bruised and used
I wasn't asked to be born pretty
If I had been, I would've refused

We dance around each other
Call it The Tango of Fear

I will not change for you.
I understand, I understand, I understand.
You have never once asked me to.
But what you don't understand is that what you want would require me to change.
It would require me to stifle parts of my soul, of who I am to make it work.
I can't silence these pieces of me any longer.
I'm sorry, but I can't make that sacrifice.
I'm sorry, I'm sorry, *I'm sorry.

And I want it, I want my life so bad
I'm doing everything I can

Well, I've got thick skin and an elastic heart,
But your blade - it might be too sharp
I'm like a rubber band until you pull too hard
Yeah, I may snap and I move fast

But you won't see me fall apart
**'Cause I've got an elastic heart

I took you off your leash
But I can't, no I can't make you heel

You are not your pain.
You are not your pain.
You are not your pain.

You are not what happened to you.
You are not what happened to you.
You are not what happened to you.

You are not what they did to you.
You are not what they did to you.
*You are not what they did to you.

As I sat in a room full of hundreds,
   crying and shaking and remembering,
I fully realized that
I am not my pain...
I am not what happened to me...
I am not what she did to me...
I am more than my depression.
I am more than my suicide attempt.
I am more than my ******.
**I am still here.