My body is clinging desperately to my stomach
Trying to get me to feel the butterflies I felt in your present once more
The pain I feel is no longer the bitterness of love
But the stabbing pain of regret
So let's end this with a smile
This affair with a love that wasn't meant to be
Has to end now

I saw you in my dreams
You smiled like it was yesterday
Before we had the fight
You smiled like you couldn't know evil
You smiled with such innocence that I could cry
Because that innocence broke for me
And the evil followed soon
I can't believe I hurt you
Because when I ripped my own heart out
The string connecting us ripped your heart out too

I'm like a dragon
I breath fiery words with the coldest impenetrable scales
That make it so no one can get to my heart
I am a dragon that eats people alive
I'm the beast that haunts the dreams and rules the sky
But like the dragon that I hold so highly
That's just a dream
Another fake fantasy
Caused by my childish personality
As I wait for each day to end the same
And my schedule to repeat
I am no dragon, simply a girl who needs to sleep

I try to think of the positives
Not electrons but things that I like
But my mind draws a blank and I know that it's wrong
But I can't think beyond today
And I know others like that
The nomads of our minds
We explore the depths that shouldn't be crossed
And we wonder 'why' too many times
So while the negatives hit me like a bullet from a loaded gun
The positives avoid me like the rich
Too good to touch the poor

I went out that night to look at the view and think
But I made the mistake of letting someone see
And when they saw they told me about how smart I was
Because it was so thoughtful that I looked up at the sky
And they said I was a dreamer
Who looked up at the stars with hopeful eyes
And I couldn't avoid a lie
I couldn't tell them that that night I wasn't watching the stars
But I was watching the headlights fly by
And I was wondering what time would be right
For me to stop staring and take my own life

I've always hated ending things
When I was younger I always left a single sentence unread in a book
Because that way I could say that the story wasn't over
The story wasn't finished and my imagination could thrive
But as I got older books became more serious
Characters died
I couldn't have that
Death meant the end so when a character died I would stop reading
I'd say the plot didn't interest me and throw it away
And this ideology took over my life and I procrastinated
I put things off as long as possible
And then when my grandfather died I did not bat an eye
It was just like the books I read
'Nothing happened, just don't bring it up'
I did that, every time someone died
Someone got hurt
A story ended
I avoided it like the plague
But what do you do when someone dies in front of you
When you hear the shallow beat of a dead heart
And when that happened I wept
Not because of something so ridiculous as a death
But because I realized I had turned into someone that didn't care
I had watched someone die
And the beep of the dead pulse only annoyed me