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 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
Jen Jordan
Roller Coaster
Sparrow
Paper Bag
Picture
Diver
Market
Elephant

Roller Coaster: This won't be the typical mention of a roller coaster, about the ups and downs. But rather the fear I felt on the line for the ride and the reassurance I was handed by my companion and how I wish to feel that safety in words again.

Sparrow: I carried a baby bird to healing 4 years ago with a broken wing. But today I was asked for help with another and I could not have cared any less. I don't know if that's because I've "come to my senses" or just lost hope in flight.

Paper Bag: sound of ripping paper in half pause This is what I really heard when you told me you're doing well, without me.

Picture: I never did know what I'd find to do with this picture of a house, that I found in a house, that used to be my house... I'll just use it to say "house", because "home" is a word I don't know what to do with.

Diver: You are a cliff diver.
You take that leap of faith.
Your safety fails you.
Your back up fails you.

Really close your eyes.
Grasp the horror.
The betrayal.
The eventual impact of landing.


Thanks, mom.

Market: Remember when we had to wash our hands after every trip to the super market to avoid germs? What did we do to avoid what really infected us? What did you teach me to keep this sickness from creeping into my chest and eating me alive from the inside out? No preventative measures were taken against the most terminal illness that I could have picked up in any market, in any lifetime. So this is me, begging for a cure, and for the medicine I seem to have missed too many doses of.

Elephant: So... How's that for an elephant in the room?
This is a poem meant to be read aloud. The only prompts given was the list of 7 words. For the section "paper bag" I begin by ripping a piece of paper down the center slowly. That is the sound. For the section "picture" I hold up a photo of a house that I found exploring my old house that has since been resold and abandoned. Thank you for reading.
 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
L
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 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
L
My spine is made of iron
My blood is acrylic paint
My tears are holy water
My eyes are raw stone
My mind is made of gold
My heart is matte polish
My thoughts are sinful fire
My dreams are wasted air
I don't know

Leigh
 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
William Le
"Write with your eyes like painters, with your ears like musicians, with your feet like dancers. You are the truth sayer with quill and torch. Write with your tongues of fire. Don't let the pen banish you from yourself."
by Gloria E. AnzaldĂșa
 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
Aeerdna
A train that never leaves the station
a bird with broken wings
an acid rain killing the spring flowers
I am
the clouds covering the full moon,
a funeral
the desert's freezing nights
I am
the thoughts that won't let you sleep at night
the deepest paper cut,
an illness with no cure
I am
the dust covering your lungs
the antagonist in your stories,
the cold wind hurting your bones.

I am the pain that hurts you the most.
I am the pain that loves you the most.
https://soundcloud.com/aeerdnaloony/your-paper-cut
My worth is not found
In thirty tablets of Tylenol Extra Strength
Chased by several shots of Everclear
Or inside someone else's body.
I used to immerse myself in this lifestyle
Until I realized I was going to waste
The feeling in my bones went missing
My desire to find that passion sank like an anchor
No search party, no Amber Alert
I was on my own
Missing an integral part of me.
I like bridges now
And I never used to.
I like flying now
I used to hate it.
But now, I look down
I don't want to plummet into the blanket of water beneath me
I don't want to hit the ground without living first.
My mind still takes me to the ruins of my past sometimes
It still holds me hostage with a gun laden with dark thoughts
But I will stay alive.
I have every reason to be dead
I have one reason to be here:
I deserve it.
Now, I drive over the George Washington Bridge
Keep my hands steady on the wheel
Sing my heart out to my favorite X Ambassadors song
Now, I sit strapped in on Delta airlines
The pilot talks about ascending
And I allow myself to rise.
He says,
"We are at fifty-thousand feet"
I smile
My spirit is now immersed in my own body
I let my tears wash over me like a monsoon
Because I am alive, darling
I do not want to jump, or fall this time
I deserve to stay soaring.
 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
L
circulation
 Feb 2016 Kaeli Hearn
L
cold hands touch lips,
slip down a neck and fade into collar bones,
and completely sink below a ribcage,
and come back out alive,
along sharp hip bones,
still just as cold,
and still moving downwards,
but they warm up once they
                  reach their destination.
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