It’s a building nausea,
from the bottom up.
I feel it coming on,
my face begins to flush.
Eyes watery with rejection,
mouth dry with jealousy.
Hands shaky with anger,
stomach churning violently.
You knew that I was fragile.
You had to know I’d break.

It was just three tiny words
that wreaked havoc such as
time immemorial seemed to have forgot
Innocuously sitting inside a dictionary
You pusillanimous pile of infected snot

There is no tampering with a raging universe
while trying to coerce a slippery fish
into a cage, such as a raging comet
But I was caught upon your fishing hook
You gelatinous mass of shark infested whale *****

Oh, I know, I wriggled a bit, I flipped
I flopped, but I was just kissing the hook
But you knew
You knew!
You heaving bucket of roadkill stew

Just three words!

You could have flung them at me
as you walked on down the road
You string of demon spittle
hacked upon the ground
then licked up by a toad

I’m going out...

Well, my friend
Not the three words I was looking for
Those words just soured on your breath
like rancid three day old meat
caught in teeth that are already bad

I KNOW WHERE SHE LIVES
(I whispered)

Then, I got really mad…
Jan 5

I have never been sophisticated
sophistication just never related
relative to everything i hated
hatred of the over-stated

i have never been materialistic
materialism isnt a characteristic
characterized by a mind that's realistic
realize i am not hedonistic

i never gave a **** about tradition
traditional is subject to my definition
defined by my own composition
composed of passion and ambition

i am a mess of the mistakes
others have made;
thoughts of you
and what you did to me
cause me to grind my teeth.
i thought you were an angel
and yes, i mean that metaphorically
but i mean it literally, too.
i was drowning in depression
and you came along to save me
and honestly,
i really thought you'd stay.
but no,
you are the devil's replica
and oh my god you know how to lie
and tempt
and burn.
you found me in a place no map could portray;
dancing with my own darkness
as if the shadows were somehow a comfort
for my delicate little heart to love.
why did you take me away from the dark
just to throw me in to it further?
i wish you'd disappear, somewhere miles away.
i wish you'd go somewhere as cold, empty and isolated as yourself.
i gave you everything
and you left me with nothing,
causing me to start a war with my skin.
do you know how much it hurts
to have to search for countless reasons
as to why you're not good enough?
do you know how much it hurts
to know you're not enough for someone
who is more than enough for you?
i do not love the person
who walked away from me that day
i am in love with the person
i thought you were.
do you know how much that hurts?
i am in love with someone who doesn't even exist!
i've spent weeks wishing you'd come back
but now,
i do not want you back.
you were only in love with the concept of me
and the thought of that makes me sick
to my stomach.
i hope that it
was worth losing me for.
it's clear her skin served you
better than mine ever did.
it's clear her body was more of a masterpiece
than mine ever was.

World in Sight
full of fear and care
Behind this Eye
No way up to there

Dreams left unseen
deep dark prevalent
To the sweet scent
scoundrel life to change

Reflection of need
Causing me to bleed
Mile away to reach
journey in sky is sketched

Life with care
only fear for me
world of passionate
struggle still my aim