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ilias Jul 2022
mother, do you not see
i cannot go down this road
i feel your tears but mom,
today I need to burn

i tell it to the birds,
and the snakes in the wood
not trying to weep
but they don‘t even listen
they never did

mother, how can you not see
how many deaths I died
trying to live
ilias Jul 2022
cry
take me to the sea
and let me weep
  Jul 2022 ilias
sancus
you take all of the
stars in the night sky with you
whenever you leave.
ilias Jul 2022
answers to the question
i was never asked

yes, my brain is on fire
it burns at a million degrees
all those mistakes
that I’m made of
are slowly breaking free
like pompeji
i‘m buried underneath
the ashes suffocate me, still,
even if no one else can see
ilias Jul 2022
i run my fingers
through the many shades
of my life
and find a thousand
******-up memories of mine
so i take a gun
and shoot them down;
i **** my brain

one cell by one
ilias Jun 2022
i shall learn to live through
the agony of summer,
through my wish to die;
but never do i feel whole,
mom i want to hide

for sure i will never know
how to cope with the pressure
of staying alive
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