It's hard not
To see my bones and
Wonder
If there is more
Where they came from
Deep down
Beneath my skin
Who knows
How many skeletons
Are buried in my soil

you don't exist when
my eyes are open
you don't exist when
my blood's not poisoned
when my soul's at peace
when my gut is full
and when I'm in company

So you exist most of the time
dear muse

Where are you right now?
Halfway through
To glassy panels
Sitting alone
Might I find you
Lost in letters
Of things I never wrote

Does the same moon
Rise upon you?
Hoary in the night
Glistening alone
Is my face
Lost in craters
Miles away

Do phantom scents
Haunt your walls
As your breathing does
For me alone
Or am I
For you lost
To be found

I'm not afraid anymore
Ever since you told me
It is not weak to cry
Something opened up
Inside of me
A void finally
Touched by light

Broken days

Living in a daze

Thinking that maybe

If I went to space

The vacuum would ****

All the air out of my lungs

I could be happy then

Crazy good friends
Come as a black
Haired girl
A wheelchair boy
A tall slim smile
Pink hair
And balloon shreds
Popped out
On the deck
Running down the halls
Laughing until sides stop
French words faded
Next week
Too far away
Five weeks later
Still sitting
And dreaming
Curled up on
A leather couch
Under blankets
Over life
Dripping in slime
Dancing in their eyes
A group of crazy good friends
Waiting outside

Soft leather words
Sliding on my skin
As if I'd ever forget
The way we stayed
Forever at
Each other's sides
Your hand
Not quite in mine
Light hearted laughter
Echoing through the dark
Corners of my mind
Breaking through
Like sunbeams
In a storm
Beautifully
Crazily
How you all accept me
Crashing words
Stripped of lies
I'll miss you
But I'll smile