You once promised me you’d take me to the moon
Yet here I am
Shivering with the stars
And lighting myself on fire with the sun
To see if I still feel something

i miss the idea of you a little.
is that wrong to say?
i miss it when i could look at you and imagine what it would be like to make you laugh.
i miss memorizing your routes to class and pretending that we just happened to cross paths.
i'd smile at you without meaning to, trying to take my heart off of my sleeve.

i miss crushing on you a little.
the same way you miss breaking curfew.
but now we're all just so tired.

i just want you to kiss me and say it's okay. say it's okay that i miss my imaginary you. because i miss the real you more.

love,
b

i don't smoke as much as i write about smoking
a cigarette just paints a better picture than a pen
when you're too broken to do anything but pull out a lighter

i found a poem at the bottom of
a cup of coffee
it looked an awful lot like you
and smelled like a promise

but my hands shook so bad
i never wrote it down