All the men in my family like, date, or marry white women. I wonder if this is self hatred personified, or is this all they know? I wonder if they are not capable of loving a black woman, are they ill equipped? Their mother is a black woman, did they not want a reincarnation of her? The most phenomenal woman.
When I ask, they say, the black woman is too tough, too loud, too ghetto, too “much.”
Ah. So they realized they can’t put a black woman in a box- on a shelf, they can’t contain a black woman. They cant take her down, dust her off and present her to the world. They can’t encase a black woman.
I sometimes see these traits in my father. The women in his life are either white as snow or light enough to pass the brown paper bag test. Only one brown skin girl, that birthed me. His most ungovernable seed. Once again reaffirming their fear that you can’t put black woman in her place, because she belongs in every place.
If you want to see if a black man thinks this of a black woman- simply ask him to describe a her. Therein lies their answer, therein lies their hurt. Therein lies their deflection.