my dreams are suicidal
my nightmares are eternal
my bank account is empty
my house is not a home
my loved one did abandon me
my body it is failing me
my twenty first birthday is approaching
i just hope i'm not alone

liquor woman
the brandy of desire
so cute in a sniffer
I've held your taste
in my mouth so long
I taste your aftertaste
that woman taste
the rush of heat on my tongue
the roar going down
chase you with kisses of beer
a cigarette
feel you warm
insides
tender
hot as the fire
of the holy ghost the
****** mary the
three things I give time to
in my throat on my lips
in my desire

I take him out
every now and again
he has to breathe get air
see the moon
see her smile by god
he is has always been
shut up
zippered in
cloistered
he deserves a day in the sun
I only let him out alone
late at night right
after a full moon

conscience
through every one of my lifes
accrued
lichens symbiotically
serve  as
a metaphor
I rely on organisms
they rely on
me

funky music ***** tonks
girls with no shoes
perfume
necks elbows every ****** thing
earrings
a girl dancing
Medicinal herb
a back beat
beating down  
cymbals
special things that
get down

My fingerprints have gone missing.
I sit and there is no dent in the cushion.
I sleep and the duvet lays flat and smooth.
I’m afraid to walk in the wet sand
For fear no footprints will be following me.
I’ve covered every mirror in the house
I can’t bear to not see a reflection.
I whistle for the dog - she doesn’t come.
I make no shadow on the wall.
The scale says I weigh nothing.
I seem to have faded like poorly dyed fabric
Left out in the blazing sun.
Can it be possible I’ve become a wraith
Of someone I once was and am no more.
I didn’t feel the transformation -
I touch my cheek and it feels warm -
But I sneeze and no one says “God Bless You” -
So I guess I’m well and truly gone.
   ljm