i don't usually dress up--
it makes me feel embarrassed
to think i look pretty in these nice clothes
so fancy, so cute
when i look like i do,
and i don't want people to think of me funny
because i thought i could dress this way
so contrary to my usual style
so opposite of the quiet loser
most have come to expect.

but sometimes i wear my favorite clothes
when it's late at night,
and no one is around,
and i put on my high heels
and that charming sweater dress,
and i look at myself in the mirror,
and wonder why i feel ashamed.

There is no greater pain
Than to love someone, and then to hate them
Form up a strong resolution to be impenetrable
Only for them to ask forgiveness
And tear down your wall
Because you know in your heart they don't love you
They can't, they never did
They miss your attention
But don't reciprocate the affection
And yet you can't let go
Because there's a foolish amount of hope
That maybe this time, this time they will love you
That maybe being a friend can lead to something more?
But you know it's not true!
And yet you listen to the pining of your heart
Because, somehow, it's supposed to make it easier