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I've got a goodbye
Just for you,
Never did think
It would end like this,
My hello was just
Like any other,
When all the rest
Thought why bother,
I came and I saw
The soul behind
Those eyes,
Waded deep
Within the lies,
Hoping I would find
Your truth raw,
Everything put to the test,
Everything put on the line,
Drying out in the sun,
***** laundry come clean,
But you had a loaded gun
Safety switch unlocked
I could see the gleam
In your eye as you cocked
The trigger ready and aimed,
Straight at my heart
Ready to put me to rest,
As much as I ducked
As much as I covered,
From the start I was fckd
I questioned why I bothered
In the first place,
To find what didn't leave a trace,
But I had nowhere to be
And I had all the time to see,
The face behind the mask,
The goal behind the task;
But all I've got left
Is my goodbye, hello's theft,
Place your memory
Under lock and key...
© okpoet
A mirrors image
never enough
to reach through the glass
touch all that I am
soft skin, lost in ecstasy
a beauty incarnate
soft angelic whispers
lifted beyond this eternal realm
years of searching for my soul
who knew it could be found
on the other side of the glass
reflecting across my forever planet
reaching out to me as I was to it
the day I crave
I shatter the glass
stepping into my world
Acceptance
Accentuates
And
Accelerates
Alacrity,
Ambition,
Acumen;
Allowing
Astounding
Achievements
And
Accomplishments
All
Alive!
Every night I fight the feeling of sleep
For when that beast begins to creep
into my body
I alarm myself with a continuous beep
A siren.
A shock.
Caffeine.
Anything to prevent a leap
Inside the abyss of my mind I find
many things askew there is nothing I can construe
My dreams leave me shaking and begging for awakening
each one mars my sanity as I writhe in agony
You see
every night
for almost a year now
I die in my dreams
They are quite vivid deaths some I can even feel.
I've been stabbed and beaten
with knives and tire irons
Shot
dissected
crushed
and impaled by metal beams
I've been skinned alive
set on fire
murdered several times
eaten alive by spiders and beasts. Some of which too horrific to describe
All I can do is fight in vain and be an unwilling audience to my own demise

There is some kind of psychological aspect to this I have yet to understand

I always end these hellish nightmares the same way
screaming at myself to wake up and hopefully I do.
I am haunted by something I do not understand
I know this because I can feel knocking on my soul's foyer
I fear going to sleep.
© January 23rd, 2013 by Timothy R Brown. All rights reserved.
Love me, as I love you.
Protect me, As I protect you.

Know, as my beloved not to let your heart be troubled.
Cause it will double the pain.
Which I must heal and calm.
Because my love for you go runneth over.

It just over flow.
It just grow and grow.
This you must know.

The scriptures states no weapons prospers formed against us.
All but the weapon of love.
It has the power to change us into better human beings.

Just remember to love me.
And protect me, as I do you.
All I want to do is make You proud
  but I am stuck sitting on fences.
I can't seem to stand fast in the straight
  So I stay, just getting splinters

I'm stuck somewhere between
  who I am and who I want to be
And the answers are so clear
  but they always seem out of reach

So I grasp at indecision
   all the while my choices break Your heart
And every day I stay in the middle
   the further we are...apart

But You never leave me
   even though it kills You to watch me live
And when I come crawling back
   all Your love You'll give

You'll coax me into restfulness
   and I'll be rebuked by Your perfection
And my bruised and broken spirit
   healed and resurrected

But again and again I let You down
   living in foolish pride
While all the time you watch
   my sin, in vain, I try and hide

I keep making my mistakes
   and You keep picking me up off the floor
And how wretched I can be won't matter
  Because You'll always love me more
The angels were entertained playing soccer
By the time they realized what was going on
They couldn't call a doctor.
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