Get me out of here.
Now.
I’m serious.
I can’t stand living here anymore.
Everyone’s crazy.
They’ve all been shooting ****** for years.
At least it seems like it.
If it wasn’t ******, it’s crack.
And if it wasn’t crack, it's pills.
And if it isn’t pills then they’ve been selling their bodies.
I don’t even understand why I’m here.
I don’t fit any of the categories listed above.
Truthfully there is nothing drastically wrong with me.
So I get a little sad sometimes,
Who doesn’t?
So I thought about jumping from the roof of my house a couple times,
Who doesn’t?
So I recently overdosed on some pain killers.
Curiosity, sadness, and death are all normal.
Right?
I tried explaining that to my mother.
Did she listen?
No.
Did she care?
Not a bit.
Did I care?
Nope.
By the time she didn’t believe the, “I’m fine” speech I knew where my fate was.
Here.
At ****** godforsaken Harmony.
Yeah, they named an institution for people with "problems", “Harmony.”
If you ask me, that will only increase feelings of suicide among people with depression.
That’s what they think I have.
Depression.
It’s a sad word in itself.
I mean has anyone stopped to think that maybe people diagnosed with depression only got really sad after hearing the actual word depression.
Hey,
Anything is possible.
In all my time of being at Harmony I’ve made a total of zero friends and have met a total of zero normal people.
Yup,
This is just what god had in mind for me.
At least that’s what it seemed like.
That is, until he put Jake Cohen in front of me.
Now Jake, has a figure that I swear can cure any form of disease.
Why?
Tell Jake to go up to a crack addict, smile that crooked smile and I know, that person will never make crack their drug of choice,
They’ll choose Jake.
I chose Jake.
I make sure to sneak a peak of his gorgeous face everyday at breakfast.
The smooth contours of his face.
How when he smiles I watch it start with the small curve in his lips.
It works its way up until he’s in a full blown grin.
From his lips I work my way to his dimples.
I scan how perfect they are.
Round and smooth, deep and hollow.
I make my way to his cheeks.
The perfect color rose.
This is when I start to blush and end up looking away.
But today, I said no.
Today I will fit in.
Today I will develop an addiction.
Today,
I will work my way to his eyes.
Boy is that a fast working medicine.
I started from the top.
Studying his hair.
The soft, soft curls that rest upon his face.
The color of milk chocolate.
I looked away.
Hey, a girls gotta take a break.
Then I began again.
Although it wasn’t such a smooth transition.
I went right for the jackpot.
I stared right at him.
Into his eyes.
The deepest eyes I’ve ever been in.
They saw me.
They grabbed me.
I spiraled.
The perfect combination of blue and green.
A mixture most people would die for.
I swam within his eyes.
High off bliss.
High off blue.
High off curiosity.
I finally found out why most girls would choose him.
I’ve never flown so fast.
It all came to a quick stop when I heard a voice.
“Got something in my teeth?.”
I’ve heard of people praying to angels,
But I never thought I would meet one.
“Don’t talk much do you?”
I took a deep breath.
My head was spinning in every direction.
“Um, uh, yeah.”
“yeah you don’t talk much?!”
What the **** did I just say?!
“Oh! No I mean I talk a lot. Sorry, don’t know what I was thinking.”
“Apparently not about this conversation, sorry to bore you.”
Dear god if only he knew.
“I’m Jake.”
I know.
“Emily.”
The biggest grin came across his face.
“Pleasure to meet you Emily.”
This time I smiled,
Inside, and out.
Tim, this is for you :)