i know i shouldn't give up on myself
i don't want to give up on myself
but
its just
too
*******
hard

TORN BEING WISHING YOU CARED ENOUGH TO FEEL BAD ABOUT HURTING ME
AND HOPING
YOU DON'T
HOPING YOU'RE OKAY
I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY
YOU HURT ME
BUT I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY
I LOVE YOU
I STILL DO
I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY
IT'S OKAY
IT'S OKAY
I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY
I WANT YOU TO HURT A HUNDRED TIMES
MORE THAN YOU HURT ME
BUT
I DON'T WANT YOU
TO BE HURT
I'M SORRY
I FEEL GUILTY FOR MY THOUGHTS
BUT
WHAT IF
YOU DON'T ACTUALLY CARe???
AND YOU'RE FINE???
I'LL BE THE ONE HURTING AGAIN
AND I GUESS
I'LL SETTLE WITH THAT INSTEAD OF
CAUSING YOU PAIN
I JUST WANT YOU TO BE OKAY
I'M SORRY
I'M SORRY ABOUT EVERYTHING
I DON'T KNOW
I'M SORRY FOR MYSELF
I THINK I LOVE YOU
BUT I'M
CONFUSED
I'M CONFUSED
I'M CONFUSED
DO I HATE YOU FOR ******* ME UP LIKE THIS?
DO I HATE MYSELF FOR LETTING THIS HAPPEN TO ME?
DO I HATE YOU FOR NOT CARING?
DO I HATE MYSELF FOR HOPING YOU DO?
BUT
I'M STILL
HOPING
YOU'RE
OKAY

actually
*******
im not sorry
*******
*******
*******

i love you
i'm sorry
i love you
i'm sorry
i love you
i'm sorry
i love you
i'm sorry

It's times like these that I wish you were still around.
I could use somebody to keep me from sleeping on the ground.

Your worry spoke volumes,
but I've since grown deaf.

You were caught up in living.
I'm hung up on death.

constantly
weighed down
by things i still
hold on to

everything i do
i do to impress you
everything i say
i say hoping you'd hear
wherever i go
i go to for i know
you're near
you're near