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 Sep 2015 Fae
Darlene Chavez
Anxiety is preparing yourself to say "here" when the teacher does attendance.
Anxiety is shaking so bad you can barely keep food on a spoon.
Anxiety is being so quiet that even your mind stops for a second.
Anxiety is never texting first because you feel needy.
Anxiety is not being able to walk up to the teacher to hand in a paper.
Anxiety is always sitting in the back of the class so you don't feel eyes know you.
Anxiety is being afraid. All the time. Afraid to love, to smile,  or even to say hello.
Anxiety is only having a few friends because it's hard to talk to people you don't know.
Anxiety is wanting to talk to the cute boy who sits across from you, but you're afraid of him knowing the real you.
Anxiety is finally saying hello

20 times in your head
 Jun 2015 Fae
Connor Ruther
Haiku #1
 Jun 2015 Fae
Connor Ruther
Soft Rabbit Paws,
Curling like waves.
Spring Delights.
 Jun 2015 Fae
Connor Ruther
You're warmer than amber and bolder you gleam,
You're as soft as my summers and sweet as my streams.
The lands of my youth and the Frazier turn black,
but for times that we spent there, I'll always go back.
 Dec 2014 Fae
Julia O'Neary
She picks up pennies
off the sidewalk and
saves them for a
honeymoon someday.

He waits for her, patiently,
like those lost pennies, for
he knows that to be touched
by her will be worth the wait.

I don't often pray,
but for a love like that
I beseech a God for
whom I've lost all faith.
 Dec 2014 Fae
Connor Ruther
 Dec 2014 Fae
Connor Ruther
I have a ring for you.
It's snug and not too small.

You could stand within, if you wanted.
Just to try it out.....for a little while.

I'll trace it around you again on the pavement in thick chalk.
A bright scribbled line. A boarder. A castle.

I lean down. And start to dig. Until my hands bleed and the pavement gives way.
I'll lift the very earth beneath you and carry you away. For you were meant for daisies and better things.
This means I love you, in my language.  
You are my breath, and I'm going to stay here and breath deeply.
 Dec 2014 Fae
Connor Ruther
I am the two tailed Comet.
I am the high and Low.
I am a wretch and Dragon.
I am a ghost of glee and Woe.

I am the perfect lover.
Who smiles with perfect eyes.
I am the imperfect lover.
Who's smile's a disguise.

I am the best at kindness.
I dream up fantastic dates.
I am, at best, the kindest.
But it seems my days come late.

I am your Master and your keeper;
Who pets you on your knees.
I am the crippled *****,
Who's rotted with disease.

But every side, both Green and Purple,
Shares a hue of deepest blue.
Every one of them is hurtful.
And hurts that it hurt you.
 Sep 2014 Fae
Connor Ruther
It's midnight and I love you.
In two hours, I will tuck you.
In one sleep, I will kiss you, with lips thankful, strong, and warm.
In two sleeps, I will guard you, 'gainst the rising summer storm.
In three sleeps, I will claim you, and never mar your skin again.
In three weeks, I will change who, you thought was in your Man.

I've spent four years in mourning, and eleven months in dread,
While the sliver sword of Damocles, dangles over my head.
I haven't slept enough or stayed consistent, falling on my heels,
But I've wept enough, and stay insistent, that my love is real.

I'm not selfish, I'm just sorry.
Like a blackfish pair upon the tide,
We're hurting cause the world just doesn't care what is inside.

I'm with you till the end, and then I'll carry you through the dark.
I love you, I love you, I love you.
I love you. Your heartbeat is my art.
 Sep 2014 Fae
Connor Ruther
Your voice is my favorite song.
Your scent is my favorite meal.
Your touch is my favorite vacation.

These are tired truths. And in some ways, those are deepest.
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