The words do not flow like they used to.
They hardly come to mind at all.
Maybe it's because I feel almost absolutely nothing
and am only comforted by the numbing sensation
of a love that is far too unreal.
All this time, I've been searching for something
and now, I feel like maybe
I've been searching for the wrong thing.
Maybe I've only been looking in the wrong places.
Maybe I'm too stubborn to accept the reality of a situation.
I'm afraid of a love that I can never feel.
I'm afraid that the distance between our bodies will always be kept
far greater than I can even fathom-
even if we were in the same room; holding hands.
I'm afraid the connections that our souls share
will quickly become tattered and cracked.
Maybe I was never destined for love.
Maybe I'm supposed to be alone forever.
Maybe I'm supposed to have my heart broken...
But, maybe, I'm supposed to break my own heart.
I think maybe I'm just meant to stay lonely.

you are behind
my happiness
but
most
of the
time behind
my sadness

however,
you are
the one
I truly love
maybe
I am too busy
looking
for your
attention
to notice
the one
who would
truly love me

free will
a free gift
we freely **** up
the choice to
decide
between good and bad
free will
causes all of our misery
in many ways it seems
we we've lost our ability
to be free

A penny for your thoughts,
kind sir?
because it seems you've gone
s i l e n t .

In fact, maybe I'll give you a dime,
no, make it a quarter
because call me selfish but twenty-five of your thoughts
might just help me get through the day.

I know you're not fond of uttering your feelings,
but I'm hoping you'll make an exception.
I'd fill your coin jar to the rim
if it meant you'd say my name again.

I'd let it overflow in gold and silver,
maybe a couple bills here and there
if it meant you smiling.
*******,

would you like my entire savings, as well? Because
I'd pay twice the wager to hear your laugh slice through the air.
A penny for your thoughts, kind sir?

Because it seems you've disappeared for quite too long.

- g.d.