My words bleed onto paper

In spreading pools of sorrow

They gush darkly

Onto the page

Pumping out until

Their life is drained

Then fall in pallor

To the floor

The stain they leave behind

Is there for all to read

A record written out

With a sorrowful pen

I can be better again
I know it
I know it
I know it
But I haven't done a **** thing to show it
My mind, all I've done is try to slow it
With drugs and *** come freedom from anything real
High enough is only when I can no longer feel
When I can't feel the pull of gravity ******* anything it can into my heart
When I can't feel the anger that crashes and thrashes til' I'm torn apart
All these things the cover me and hide me from the truth
All the signs that show I'm just denying the written proof
Because I refuse to listen to my friends who should know best
Because I refuse to lie with those who offer a place to rest
On my own, I've always felt I must
Because any bridge that doesn't burn will just rust and turn to dust
I've abandoned all who I've feared would do the same
I've given up on playing because I thought I'd lose the game

Inoutinoutinoutinout
Inhaleholdbreathcountexhale
Inoutinoutinoutinout
Roomspinningroo­mspinning
Diediediejustkillyourselfyou'reworthless
Inoutinoutinou­tinout

i visited you on a Saturday
and i didn't know
       what to expect.
you wore a blue sundress
that afternoon,
and we stepped into the shade
of a weeping willow.

we laid and talked,
                    only talked and held hands.
after a while we walked back to
  where you sleep
                    and  talked again.
we talked and then
my love for you grew
  as a young man's love will naturally grow
when he is in the arms of his love,
  when he is in the arms of love.
                   we kissed
and such a sweetness i found!

a sweetness as only young ones know when
  tasting love for the first time came from
                     your mouth!
my God! your mouth...

and then we fell,
                     both of us this time,
  fell into something we did not understand,

                     but knew just the same!
we had been waiting,
                     one for the other...
to be complete
  we gave in to what we could only feel.

nothing we could see or had heard of could have

                     helped us learn this bravery
  against youth.

and so we fell,      
                     blindly, expectantly,
knowing only that
  my shadow, my highest,
                     my heartbeat

would always be yours:
  my first, my all-time, my yellow;
                     walk with me again...