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Eleni Oct 2016
It was a joke they said.
But is it really?
Everytime you shoot me down with your words.
Is it really a joke?
You say things to make others laugh
I guess it feels good to know that you're funny.
But can you please stop making me the the joke?
After a while you realize tears in my eyes
you laugh and everyone else does too.

Is it a joke when I laid down in bed
and thought about all the things you said?
Is it a joke when I thought about death for the first time?
Tell me is it a joke now?
Is it a joke when you wouldn't stop and told me I was
Worthless?
I cried then.
You told me I should **** it up.
Tell me is a joke when you told me that
No one would miss me if I was dead?
I wondered in my head was it a joke?

One day they had a announcement.
Everyone wore black that day.
They said a fellow student has passed.
Your eyes widened and looked around.
When you saw my seat was empty all you said was
“She should have learned to take a joke.”
Eleni Oct 2016
I have a disease
A disease of the mind
It pushes sadness in me a weight in my chest
It spreads panic like a wildfire
I wish someone would be able to lift the weight
Extinguish the panicky fire in me
But I know they cant I have to do it myself
Its hard but I will still try

— The End —