i saw your face in a streetlight.
the soft glow reminded me of your jaw, of your teeth.
of your kind smile.

it taunted me.
it flicked and flared,
much similar to the way our love did.

you will never leave my soul, or the streets of my hometown.

I’m sorry.
I’m sorry for the bite in my words.
I’m sorry for the bile that rises in my throat.
I’m sorry for the tone of my voice.
I’m sorry that this may be all that I am.

When you look at someone
I want to be looked at

When you smile
I want the smile

When you laugh
I want the laugh

When you walk away
I want to chase

When you love someone
I want it to be me

Its selfish to think, to even want you
because at the end
it's her and not me.

When I said my final goodbye,
it was an act of mercy for myself.

So why does mercy still feel like mourning.

I will always keep my promises to you.
No matter how far, or how wide, they will always remain.
Maybe this makes me selfish, to hold onto a part of you that you do not even hold.
Maybe it doesn’t, i’m not sure.
But i do miss you, and i will always miss you.
A part of me separated by time and memories lost.

I hope you’re well, although i don’t think you wish the same for me.

I am walking through my days with a heart that refuses to beat for anything.
hunger without an appetite,
thirst without a mouth,
words without a voice.

An empty case of what was.