She was far away
In some distant land
In her head
One only she had the
Endurance to navigate
I am an artist of geography.
She would tell me
On the days
She was deeper in
The jungle of her mind
Than she usually was

But I wanted to save her
So I sent out
A search team
To find someone
Who was not really lost
Either way nobody
Could find
This girl.

One day
Years later
There was a knock
On my door
I still have not
Reached the pacific,
I am trying
To find the limits
Of this land
In my head
But I have yet
To find the coast.
I am trying
To make a map
Of my mind
And when I do
I will paint you a copy.

But you are limitless
I wanted to tell her
no map could encompass
the capacity of sheer beauty
that your mind is
But instead
I watched
And I let
Her walk back
Into the jungle

And years ago
They fought
They fought for the basic
Rights
Every human
Regardless
Of race
Or gender
Deserves
Freedom
They fought
And we said no

And now we are embarrassed
By the pain
And the hurt
And the suffering
That we caused
But we can’t take it back
So we pretend it is not there

And years ago
They fought
And today they fight again
And we cause pain
And hurt
And suffering
They fight and we say no

Years from now
Our humiliation
Will be harder to mask
The face in the mirror
That you see
That has caused
The pain
And hurt
And suffering
Will not be beautiful
It will not be what you expect
All because you said no
Again
To a right
Every human
Regardless of
Race
Gender
And sexuality
Deserves

This is not a war
Of your God
Or their God
We do not stone
The man and woman
Who divorced
We accept it
And move on
Leaving
That judgment
To God
Why can we not do the same?
Does Matthew 7:1
Not say
“do not judge,
or you too will be judged.”
So why
Does this continue
Only to one day be
As obvious as a choice
As it was to give freedom
To every person

Because this cannot be
Freedom
If we are not all
Free

There occurred a dual
Between my instinct and you
About a world behind my back
Of which the light it utterly lacked
It was so dark that even your eyes,
what your hands did, could not visualize

But of course your brain knew
What you allowed yourself to do
And as you lied straight to my face
I watched it all leave you, goodbye to your grace

If I don't make you laugh on your worse days if I'm not the one that
you go to when you don't want to speak to another human being
if I don't put a smile on your face
just by you listening to my voice
If I don't make your heart skip a beat
when I say I love you
leave me
If I'm not on your mind 24/7
maybe even less
(so it can be an exception)
and if my name is not on your school notebooks with hearts on it
(maybe my name in a light grey)
leave me
run away from me
far, far away
if the thought of you not wanting to speak to me again crosses your path
on days you hate me
leave me
if I don't make you squirm in happiness
even if it's just by the simple word
of hello
and make you the saddest when i say
the simple words of just good bye
leave me
just please leave me
just please do so
because you deserve better and
there is someone out there
who will make you feel
the way I wish I could make you feel

so leave me

j.f