Death happens every day
From the smallest insect
To the most giant of all beasts
Death happens every day

We live our lives
As if we will all live forever
Carry on taking it all for granted
Carrying on until

One day, a friend dies
And everything stops
And somehow takes on
A different meaning

At least for a while
At least for a while

We stop, we gather
We think and feel differently
We cry, we remember, we pray, we sleep,
Strangely exhausted from our grief

And then we return to life
Back to our routine
Back to being surrounded by
Thousands of deaths, insignificant to us, invisible to us

Yet we should remember
That one day we will be gone,
As will all of those around us
And that means something to everyone

What does a poet see
That others do not?

What discoveries do they make
By returning faithfully to the page?

What meaning do they convey
Through ordering words for us to read

What do they see
That others do not?

The monster has wild eyes and crazy hair
The monster spits angry shouts and beats violent fists
The monster tears up books and smashes houses
The monster runs through the streets howling obscenities

But

Underneath
There is a child who wants to learn
A child who wants to grow
A child who values peace and friendship
A child who values love

Friend
You are gone too soon
From this earthly place

Gone too soon
And so quickly
That I wasn’t able to say
'Goodbye'
I didn’t even say
‘Thank you’
And I am so sorry for that

Friend,
I feel that your energy
Is still surrounding me
And that you are watching
What is happening in this world
Observing what we will do next

And I know
That I must act wisely and truthfully
If I am to honour you
And all the things
That you stood for

Friend
You didn’t want to talk about your illness
You preferred to work and work
Right until the end
Giving all that you could
To those who depended on you

And now your departure
Has shaken us all
Left us shocked and stunned
Barely able to understand
Anything at all

Friend
Your life was as beautiful
And strong
As a diamond
Your commitment to building community
Unshakeable

Friend
You will be missed
By so many people

Perhaps you didn’t realise
What you meant to them all

Perhaps you did

Maybe you knew
That your time
Was drawing near
And you needed to be
Near your birthplace
Far away from this place
Surrounded by your children
And your parents

And we
Will gather together
When you are laid to rest
To mourn
The passing
Of an honest
True
Friend

You and me
Upon the sea
Are floating
On the breeze

Tripping
Slipping
Skipping
Flipping

To a beat
That’s deep
Neat
And Sweet

We move
With the groove
And the rhythm
Of the flow

We click
Are slick
Fit
And quick

I'm stuck
Here
With
Myself

And no matter
How hard
I try
To escape

I will
Still
Be
With
Myself
When
I return
To my senses

What
Did I expect
To Find
In
Such
A place?

What
Strange monsters
Have
I been
Running
From?

Were they
Even
Real?

This
Protracted
Solitude
Leaves me
No choice
But to experience
My life
Just as it is

And
Yes
There
Are questions

And
No
I
Don't
Have
Answers

So,
I'm stuck
Here
With
Myself

And
No matter
What comes
To Pass

I will
Remain
Stuck
Here
With
Myself
Forever

For
This
I imagine
Is
The eternity
Of my life

Eternally
Individual
Eternally
Me

So

If
I can
Make peace
With myself

Then
Maybe
Everything
Will be
Ok

And
The journey
Of my life
Will feel
Beautiful

And
That
I suppose
Is
How
It should be

And
So
Now
Is
The time
To make
Peace

A family of three magpies
Is building a home
At the end
Of my garden

They chat
Clacking and clicking
Keeping an eye on me

Way above
Swifts swoop and dive
Playing in the gentle evening warmth

Whilst down below
Bees drink the last drops of the day
Sweet nectar from peach coloured roses

The daisies heads have turned west
While an ocean of pregnant clouds
March silently eastwards

Winged six-legged creatures
Creep and crawl
Making pilgrimages across leaves
To take them, who knows where

Spiders webs are spun
And their engineers sit in a trance
Waiting for the end of the world

And the great, ancient trees
Sigh at all of it
Happy, as am I
To be surrounded
By the wonder of living things

Dear reader
Did you know
That you may well have saved me?

These written words
Come from deep inside of me
They are my effort, my attempts
To pin the pages of my life
To something or somewhere
That will outlast my time here

You see I am given to thinking
That unless I find some meaning
In each and every diurnal course
And record my daily memories
In my own personal way
I may as well
Just float away on the breeze
And let the balmy days roll into each other
Blurring into a cloud
Of missed opportunities

This poem
Should you ever come to read it
Tells you all you need to know
About my work

It reveals nothing but
My personal struggle
With my very immortality
It shows my clumsy attempts
To grasp this very moment
And imprint it
On something
‘Real’

And should your eye
Ever pass over these lines
In some distant future
Then maybe you will know
What I am feeling right now

And if you know that feeling
Maybe you will have felt it too
And together
We may have somehow found meaning
In our very existence
Creating
A connection
That bridges
The space and time
Between us

Dear reader
I may be long gone by the time you read this
But your attention
Has kept a small part of me
Alive

Why is it
That every time we meet
The emotional furnaces of the past
Bubble up and blast?

Ocean swimming
To refresh the body
And the soul

Watch the golden sunlight
Dance
On the rippling waves

Let the cold saltwater
Cleanse your skin
And re-invigorate you

Allow the swell and sway
Of the tides
Lift you up and lay you down

Inside me
Is alchemy
I can make potions
Within my soul

Inside me
New realities
Are conjured
Like nothing ever conceived before

Inside me
Is a galaxy
Of endless possibilities
Fluid, fresh, limitless

Inside me
Is the universe
And everything
That the universe has ever contained

What do you do
When you get the feeling
That, there’s not so much
To look forward to?

What do you do?

Do you wait for it to pass?
Do you weep and wail
To let the world know how you feel?
Or do you keep it inside?

What do you do?
When you feel just a little bit…low
Do you force a smile
Put on a brave face?
Or do you wear a frown?
And sigh with the eyes of a heartbroken clown

What do you do?
When you wonder whether
All your effort and hard work
Doesn’t really amount to very much at all
And you wonder
Why you still get up each day
And carry on
Because the alternative
Isn’t worth contemplating

Id like to know what you do
Because Id like to know what to do, too

Do we all have times like these?
I’d like to know if you do, too
Perhaps I’d feel a little lighter
If I knew it wasn't just me....

I watch the fire
Performing
A jaggedy dance
In the black night
The wildness of its transformation
Commands my attention
As dry wood rapidly degrades
Into ashes and embers

Am I a dreamer
In your drama?
It’s no calmer
In my karma
Am I a worrier
Not a warrior
Feeling wearier
Of being ‘inferior’?
I might be doubting
Not doing
Though my eyes
Can still see through ya
Cos, you’re the prophet
Chasing profit
A human
Inhumane
Playing games
With our brains
When it rains
In your reign
You’re the sovereign
Who’s not botherin’
We need a leader
Who can lead us
But we won’t wait
For that date
It’s got too late
To trust in fate
So, we will fight
Through this fright
And put things right
As is our right

You've got to
You have to
You ought to
You should've

You mustn't
You ought not
You best not
You're not

You must've
You should've
You'd better
You best not

You're better
Than that
Much better
By far

But if you
Or if you
When you do
What you do

You know you
Can't do that
Without this
For sure

So do it
Don't do that
Or do this
Or do that

Or else you'll
Find out you
Don't know who
You are

Slowly
Inevitably
Unremittingly
We age

Second by second
Minute by minute
Hour by hour
Day by day
Week by week
Month by month
Season by season
Year by year

We grow
Older

We experience
Life
From
A
New
Perspective

Travellers
Journeying
Through each passing phase

The miracle
Of birth

The joy
Of childhood

The confusion
Of teenage-hood

The confidence
Of early adulthood

The wonder
Of parenthood

The realisation
Of middle age

The acceptance
Of physical decline

The blossoming
Of the incarnate spirit

The magnificent sunset
Of our final years

The adventure
Of our own death

The mystery
Of the after life

The rhythm
Of the universe

Birth
Ageing
Sickness
Death
Birth
and
Death

Day
And
Night

One
Always
Giving way
To
The other

A gift
To us all

A gift
That we embody

Be yourself!
Follow your instinct
Do what you should do
To fully express
Your life

Be yourself!
Stop pretending
To be wise
Strong
Intelligent
Or in control

Be yourself!
Never push
Others around
To get
What you want


Be yourself!
Be who you are
Express yourself
As honestly
As would
Your inner child

Be yourself!
Don’t buy
Into the need
To please
Or appease
Speak your mind

Be yourself
Create!
Things that you need
To live the way
You want

Be yourself
Be your self
Be
You…r
Self

How many times
Was I angry today?
How many times
Was I happy?
The days go by
And the world seems to stay the same
But I change
From moment to moment

Problems are part of life

The greater our problems
The greater the opportunity
To reveal the indomitable spirit
Of the human being

And the greater
The benefit we receive
As we reveal new wisdom
To create innovative solutions

Without problems
We cannot transform
Our own lives
Or the world around us

Revealing
Gratitude
Courage
Wisdom
And
Compassion
Every day
Will transform
This age
Of suffering
Into a new reality

Although I try to find the words
To explain the hurt I feel
I end up tying myself in knots
And falling deeper
Into this hole

Justice should be easy to declare
Fairness easy to explain
But when it comes
To family ties
It is a minefield or so it seems

We have to generate hope

Hope that our future
Will be bright
Joyful
Happy

Filled with the freedoms
That we have lost

The more hope we generate
The more things will move
In a positive direction

Negative perspectives
Act like weights
On our bodies
Hindering our progress

Bright optimism
Will refresh us
Lift us
Carry us
To the safety
Of future shores

When we talk
I find out things about you
That I didn’t know

When we talk
I discover beliefs that I have held
And never shared

When we talk
The energy between us
Causes me to grow and change

I
Have

This day
This body
This family
This food
This drink
This air
This sky
This water

This earth
This community
This challenge
This opportunity
This moment
This chance
This hope
This life

I
Will
Not
Waste
It

So you wish I was dead
You wish you could extinguish
My very presence from your life

You wish you had never met me
And that you had a life with someone else
Someone better

So you wish that I would disappear
You wish that the earth would swallow me up
You wish that the love I tried to give
Would vanish into a dark distant abyss

You wish that all of the things I ever did
Were extinguished from history
And that there was nothing but air
In my stead

Well I am sorry
But I do exist
And all the things I have tried to do
Are inextinguishable
Including the things I tried to do for you
They have all left their mark on our history

And because you wish me gone
I no longer know anything about anything
And I feel my heart sinking
And I wish that I could vanish into thin air
And that by doing so
I would feel nothing
Not even my own existence

But I know enough to know
That wherever I go
Whatever I do
I will not be able to escape the person I am
I am not able to escape the things that I have done
Or the upset that I have caused
Or the joy I may have given
And so here I am

This person who you would have gone
Still here
Just
Here

I got the old furlough blues
I simply don’t know what to do
The world has changed
And I’ve got no clue
If normal will return
For me and you

I had a job
But its all shot through
I’ve got three weeks of nothing
The State’s paying my dues

I wake up late
But I don’t sleep well
The smallest task
Starts feeling like hell

I got the old furlough blues
I simply don’t know what to do
The world has changed
And I’ve got no clue
If normal will return
For me and you

I’m trying to keep on
An upbeat path
But reality is
This isn’t a laugh

I’m tired of dealing
In uncertainty
I’m bored of the endless
Cups of tea

I got the old furlough blues
I simply don’t know what to do
The world has changed
And I’ve got no clue
If normal will return
For me and you

I want to break out
I want to feel free
To give you a hug
And dance until three

I’m through with this lockdown
I’m sad and I’m blue
Guess that’s what they call
The Furlough blues

Now is the time
When the blue of day
Melts into the grey of night
And a single black bat flutters
Back and forth

Now is the time
When the first stars twinkle
And the great trees turn black
As sirens wail and the drunken woman screams

Now is the time when the hour of the dog
Gives way to the pig
When grey moths flutter against half open windows
And the woman screams again

Now is the time
When the safety of the day
Gives way to the uncertainty of night
And somewhere a steel guitar strums

Now is the time
When the thoughts that pass through my mind
Turn to the fragments of the day
And the uncertainty of the future

Now is the time for naked embrace
For music, and heavy eyelids
For the shields of our armour
To drop as we slide towards sleep

And with the doors to our souls left ajar
The dreams of the universe approach
And soak into our consciousness
Only to disappear
At dawn

Rain
Fall
Upon
Our
Earth

Rain
Wash
Away
Our
Sadness

Rain
Purify
Our
Sullied
Communities

Rain
Keep
Us
Still
And
Silent

Rain
Show
Us
How
To
Give

Rain
Lead
Us
To
The
Truth

Rain
Draw
Us
Close
To
Nature

Rain
Bring
Us
Re
Birth

Do not panic
Breathe
You have
This moment
And that
Is all
You have

All other things
That have passed
Have passed

All things that will come
Will come

But for now
Breathe
Deeply

Be with yourself
Be with everything and everyone
That is with you
Be they living
Or non-living

Appreciate the beauty of our universe

For in time
All things around us
Alive or not
Will transform
Into some different entity

Nothing last forever
Be sure of this

Statues of tyrants
Forged from enduring materials
Will topple
As the voices of the ordinary
Surge forward
And demand
Truth and respect

Be your truth
Share it
Connect it to
Your environment

And be part of
Change

We couldn’t resist
Taking a dip
When we went to the coast

High tide sea was still and pure
Lapping the sandy beach
Beckoning softly

Cursing we had no swimmers
We looked at each other
And made up our minds in an instant

In we would go
Just to feel the glow
That comes from a swim
In the icy floe.

Jeans and jumpers
Were left stranded on the beach
And bewildered walkers
Watched us shiver

As we waded into the silvery blue
One step, another, another
No chance to change our minds
In we go
Wow, woop, weee, hieee
Its’ cold but oh so…

I swim to warm myself
You float and smile
And we are in the glorious sea
Whilst the walkers watch on in curiosity
And children play with the sand
And then, the treat
Of hot coffee on the beach
To warm us up
It was such a lovely day

Only now
Am I learning the art
Of loving

In my childhood
‘love’ had to be earned

And this injurious transaction
Has stained
The decades
Of my adult life

And yet
I somehow
Know
That I can learn
To love

And that love
Must be directed inwards
As well as outwards

This is not
White vs Black
This is everyone vs Racism
Racism is not just a problem in America
Black Lives Matter!
Say their names
Justice for
Belly Mujinga; George Floyd; Tony McDade; Eric Gardner; Trevor Smith; Breonna Taylor; Sean Fitzgerald; Mark Duggan; Trayvon Martin; Chinedu Okabi; Ahmaud Arbery; Sarah Reed; Michael Brown; Aiyana Jones; Tamir Rice; Jordan Davies; Sean Rigg; Alton Sterling; Phlando Castile; David Dungay; Jamel Floyd; Christopher Alder; David McAtee; Julian Cole; Sheku Bayoh
No Justice, no peace
No freedom until we are equal
White silence is Violence
End Police Brutality
Stomp out racism
Stop killing my people
‘Please…please…please – I can’t breathe…’

I hear you
I see you
I stand with you

I will always return to the sea
I will never tire of the tides
I cannot forget
The ebb and the flow
The drawing back
And the rolling in

For I am a man of the sea
I am briny and shaggy and old
The blue in my eyes
Is drawn from the depths
And the brown of my hide
Scooped from the beds

I will always return to the sea
I will never tire of the tides
I cannot forget
The ebb and the flow
The drawing back
And the rolling in

My wiry beard is woven from weeds
My bones are welded stones
My hands are like starfish
And my feet like rocks
My breath is the gush
And the rush of the foam

I will always return to the sea
I will never tire of the tides
I cannot forget
The ebb and the flow
The drawing back
And the rolling in

If I should fall right off this earth
And my shoulders collapse from the strain
Then burn me through
Collect up my ashes
And scatter me onto the waves

For I am a man of the sea
I am briny and shaggy and old
The blue in my eyes
Is drawn from the depths
And the brown of my hide
Scooped from the beds

I will always return to the sea
I will never tire of the tides
I cannot forget
The ebb and the flow
The drawing back
And the rolling in

Men who justify
Everyday acts of violence towards minorities
In the name of law enforcement

Men who justify
Every acts of ****** predation
On young and vulnerable women

Men who justify
Catastrophic damage to the environment
In the pursuit of material wealth

Men who exploit
The birth rights of others
Through cunning trickery

Expose
And explore the ugly impulses that drive your behaviours

Transform
The dark energies that lurk within you

Educate
Yourselves so that you may treasure others

Extinguish
Your arrogance and shine with decency

Men
This is how you can change the world

The world
Is still a beautiful place
Even though we inhabit
The darkest caves
Of the human soul
In the depths of our lives
Sway cool turquoise lagoons of joy
Pierced by golden sunbeams of hope
Fresh running streams of laughter
Nourish bodies vibrant with health
There are unending riches
And there is peace

The world is still a beautiful place
Seeking spirits
Will in the end
Take us beyond the shadows
Of our foolish existence
And will lead us finally
To the light

Like a teenager, feeling bored
I sit in the too hot sun
And I can’t think what
Whatever should be done

It’s a Sunday feeling
Through and through
My soul reflecting
The sky of blue

I keep looking for things
Outside myself
To remove this feeling
And feel something else

Perhaps I can chase off
The hungry flies
That buzz around
Disturbing the quiet

But I don’t want peace
Or even quiet
I want an adventure
Something to try out

I want strange things
Never seen before
I want to escape
Break down some doors

I want to
I want
I want
I…think

I need
To stop
And…rest
I think

Perhaps I'm ill?
I'm not myself
Becoming instead
Like someone else?

It’s Sunday
I’m too hot
And that's what
I've got

I will wait
It will pass
If I lie
On the grass

Today
I painted two pictures
Retrieved an empty sweet packet
And a football
Drifting in the sea
As I took
A cooling swim
I played cards with my daughter
Spoke to my sister
Finished my book
Made lunch and dinner
And wondered about my inner ambitions
My restless desires
And I let them go
A little

America is burning
Once again

The rage of good kind people
Burns
At this cruel
Barbarism

Why is it
That skin colour
Still divides
Human beings

They say
'Things have changed'
'Things are better now'

But has anything changed?
Really?

Can anyone
Say anything
To put this terrible wrong
To right?

Does anybody
Have an answer
To this human sickness?

What grip do you have on our Prime Minister, Mr Cummings?
You break the rules of lockdown
Rules you co-engineered
Rules you expect everyone else to follow
And yet, your boss Mr Cummings
Stands by you Mr Cummings
Defends you to the hilt
As if you have done nothing wrong

Is there some dark secret that you hold Mr Cummings
That would topple this Government?
Is there some weapon of blackmail
That you wield behind the scenes Mr Cummings?
What is this grip you have Mr Cummings?
Please tell, for the truth will out
Eventually
And it would be better
For everyone
If it came from you

Out there
Is a magical place
Unsullied by human mess

Pure, paradisiacal
Quiet

Sea water flows quietly
And sand is soft
And healing underfoot

We are half a mile out
Maybe more

And we have crossed
A curious river
To reach
The ray

Although we have lived
Many years in this place
We have never ventured here before

Discovering this new place
Has brought us closer
Together

There is fear
And there is uncertainty
And it continues

And I don’t have any answers
And neither do 'they'

So we have to sit
Alone
Or with family
And wait
And wait
And wait

But we will rise up
Even though
They say that the powerful
Are strengthening their grip
On the masses

Even though
The poor and weak
Are afflicted
The most severely

Even though
The night stretches out before us
And dawn
Seems so far away

We, the people
Will find such strength
As cannot be imagined

And we will rise up
Higher and stronger
Than ever before

And through our love
And our compassion
We will
Win the day

You are small and grey
Furry and neat
With kind eyes
Of pure green
And a purr
That makes us all feel
Cosy

Each day you sit in silence
On the sofa
While I work at the desk
And you seem happy to spend the hours with me
Resting your chin on a cushion
While I try and work out a way
To keep my business alive

When you were little
You rushed around our house
Exploring every hidden place
Climbing out of the highest windows
And clambering down drainpipes

But now you know the most comfortable spots
Aware of what is best for you
And your children
Knowing these things
You never get into arguments
Only seeming interested in kind encounters

At dinner time
You always make sure
The others have arrived
Before you take your first bite
And this makes you
The kindest cat in our house
And we love you for it

Crisps
Chocolate
Doughnuts
Coffee
Salted Peanuts
Lemon cheesecake
Cappuccino
Cigarettes
Gin and Tonic
Pint of Cobra
Curry, rice
Poppadums
Onion bhaji
Squeeze of lemon
Fizzy coke
Lemonade
Ben and Jerry’s
Ice cream
Eggs Bacon
HP sauce
Mushrooms, hash browns
Fried Bread
Baked Beans
Butter, eggs
Marmalade
Just the best

To be in this team
Surrounded by friends
Willing each other on
Even though
We might be defeated
By these circumstances
Is precious

For when we look back
We know
That we will have fought together
And our shared struggle will be
Such a precious memory
That when our victory comes
It will be that much sweeter
And we will celebrate
All the more

So I cried this morning
And cried
And cried until
The need had passed

Years have passed
And still I cry
Still I am
Crying

What does this mean?
What is the deeper meaning?

What this means to me
Will for sure mean something different to you

All I know is that my emotions
Were rushing up inside me like
Flood Waters
Ready to overcome any obstacle
Unstoppable
Out of control
Dominant
Gushing
Until the surge had passed
And I was left
Somehow
More grounded
A little more pure
A little more
Me

I sit and watch the tide come in
I watch wild flames engulf dry wood
I watch the green eyes of my wife
I sit with the unease of my humanity

It’s no good me carrying on
As if things will go back
To how they were

The world is changing
And I will be forced to change
Whether I like it or not

It is said that there are response phases
To contend with during change...
Shock and denial
Anger and bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

And then,

The future...

The world is changing
And I will be forced to change
Whether I like it or not

Will I be stuck in shock or depression
Passive in my acceptance
And become a victim of the changes?

Or active in the change
A contributor of new exploration
A pioneer on the front lines of the unknown?

The world is changing
And I will be forced to change
Whether I like it or not

I the Commuter Poet, no longer commuting
Am writing a poem a day throughout this year
And my history, my contribution, my response
May well be told and remembered
Through these very words

For the world is changing
And I will be forced to change
Whether I like it or not

We can always smile at one another
Even though are hears ache
We can make each other laugh
Even when times are tough
We can wish for the very best
Even though we fear the worst
Because we are
Family

How soft and comforting
To sit upon the beach
Clutching handfuls of warm sand
And gazing upon the glistening sea

The waves obey the to and fro
Swishing and swashing
As gulls surf the skies above
And children play at waters edge

Fresh briny air cools our faces
As we pick pebbles and stones
Until we decide to return home
Happy once more

Social Distancing
Face masks
Check your temperature
Persistent Cough
Stay at home
Keep your distance
Two metres apart
Stay Alert

Defeat the Virus
Protect the NHS
Save Lives
Wash your hands
Sing the National Anthem
Twice
Covid Secure workplace

Work from Home
Daily Death Rate
Keep the r
Below one
Exercise once a day
Jo Wicks
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Stay safe
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Global Pandemic
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Wuhan

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Flatten the peak
Second Wave
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Bird song
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Never Ending