I say I'm this you say your that online
friendship an illusion of  pixel's seen
on a screen. I say I'm the age I think
you want me to be, but I can be what
ever I want behind this screen.

I talk with you and also them, grooming
them to be an online friend, I am not
what you think. I am older younger I
could be sixteen but really fifty three,
my age and *** is what I  wish it to be.

For online friendship is an illusion, you
see pixels and words can tell a thousand
lies, but you crave a friendship and with
that you found me and my lies.

I could ask you to do things, if not you
the new friend I meet last week. I am
an online friend but you'll never really
know am I a woman, a man  for all you
know I could be a teenage kid showing
friends what you sent me to show everybody.

Now on the web, for all to see and show.
Trust  no one that you have never meet in
person, as an on line friendship is just as
fake as the picture you may see that person
you'll probably never meet.

Six feet under and no signal on
my phone, I was buried dead but
I just wanted to phone home.

The life of a corpse is no fun, there is
no air in this coffin, it has long since
gone.

I look around with the one eye left, my friend
earth worm tim, calls my other socket home,
now only my bad eye left. I would smile but
my lips are gone, they fell next to my ear
whispering sweet nothings for fun.

I wish I,d been cremated, just ash in the wind
think of the travelling I'd have done. But
no I'm six feet under, bored to death
for eternity, this is not the life i'd
want dead or alive this is just no fun.

She's open like a 9 till 5 store, night
shift worker short skirt cleavage
enhancing bra, making it look like
she has more than she has got. She
can offer you different services, its
just how much paper you have in
your wallet to what you get and see.

She smiles, does the deed she'll
swallow for extra, but she asks are
you clean? She smiles when finishes
licks the last bit off her mouth, she
gets out and again walks the street
to find the next drive by wallet, that
wants some late night fun.

She smiles when she sees you but
under that smile is disgust, a job not
wanted not wrote on her next CV. A
single mother with no job, a friend
looks after the baby, a job not wanted
she throws up after every meet.

The world is not what you think, some
do this 9 to 5 job not because they like
it, but to pay bills to put food on the
plate. Because no one is going to help,
the father ran out and left her with
the baby. She is strong for her little one
and does this so she can care for her
baby. hoping that one day she'll
not need to walk the streets.

I wish to scream, to explode
the mirror in front of me, I
see unclean, I see weakness
within me.

I wish I could hit out, to remove
this fear with in, to hide the marks
given to me for just being me.

My rage and anger are deep, but to
you I am weakness never a chance
to fight back as you stain my child
hood with violence bruises where
others can not see.

You install terror and fear, is this a
life worth this much pain will it
ever end will I be free.

Silent screams at the mirror as I see
only weakness that you have made
me feel, I am, I will not give up I
maybe just a child but I will grow
and then one day the fear you will
fear will not be on me but retribution
for the push bag you made me..

My eyes a shimmering pool
of hate as I look as you, the
blue waves like a storm in
a tea cup as they splash against
the white of my eyes.

Red on white like lava angrily
scorching at the white of my
eyes, showing the feeling
boiling with in.

I was just innocently walking,
you took my safety away
when you shoved that knife
in to me, all that pain to feed
a habit of destruction, and my
only sin was to walk where your
next fix was, my only sin.

I see you behind a mirror, with
a toothless grin, number 5 I point,
I could never forget you burnt in
to retinas I see you every time its
dark but I will not be weak I will
fight the darkness the fear you
installed with in.

I am a survivor of violence, my only
crime was to be your next victim, but
the tables have turned, and your life
in a cell, freedom taken like you tried
to do to me

My pillow an ant nest of noise
as my ear heard every thing
inside, I look inside, disbelief
as nothing, I rest my head
and hear them scurrying
around inside one again.

The darkness kept me awake
with its blackened noise its
shadows keep my eyes closed
tight but not with sleep with
fright.

I leave the light on TV too, the
bliss of seeing all around, the
noise of Hawaii  5 o in the
back ground subtle are the
beats of noise and light that
send me to blissful sleep..

I'm invisible, forgotten, a memory in someone's head
I want to be remembered, lauded, loved
But you put paid to that.
I wonder how you sleep, dreamless, more likely
How do you sleep like an innocent? Teach me.

If I shouted would you hear me?
If I hurt you would you feel me?
If I threw a glass at you would you see me?
If I blew softly in your face would you get cold?
If I kissed you deeply would you ******* rotting corpse?

I tried to climb to the
heavens but the rope
snapped, it frayed under
my weight of how high
I tried to get.

I tried to fly but I fell
to the ground, to lick
my wounds and get
back up from the
ground.

I climbed the highest tree,
the mountains where the
air was thin, I couldn't
climb fly any higher.

Then I realised that I
was reaching for some
thing that wasn't there.

I should have faith in my
self in others not trying
to rely on that which is
not really there.

I relied on some thing
that we all fall under the
curse of believing in some
thing non existent.

But  now I believe, believe
in myself and others not
something that isn't even
real just words wasted in air
my feet are firmly on the
ground.