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 Dec 2012 Caitlin Drew
unnamed
The funding of my own little massacre,
my own precious little war crime. My smoke
is everywhere. My father coughs in his sleep.
My mother gags, hangs her head out the window, sick.

My cheap *** before and after cheap ***.
I chat up some high-waisted pastiche on Alberta.
She tells me collage this and that and looks
so lit up and skinny, it's a dream.

Where I go to brand myself. I have this image
of a spark on my arm sitting stovetop red,
sinking into the skin, losing color as it digs,
turning to grey and then nothing like the drowning
of a comet's tail in atmosphere. My burns look so good
in the pale dormitory bathroom shower light: so baby tulip
and teeth, so how-I've-made-it-through-the-wringer.
Christ, I should be a film, look at me: so bent and bright,
such a cute boxer, such a prize fight.
We are lovers in color,
salted scents that stick to covers.
Splayed out on your coral-reef couch
hackneyed and bleeding,
bleary but needing,
I've settled quietly into your imprints of indifference.

Stale ***** tongue                                                           ­     I'm late for work.
      speaks insipidity:                                                      ­       Shower if you want to.
                                                            ­                                 Lock the door as you leave.
                                                         ­                                      It was nice seeing you.

I lay there greying all morning.
Soaking into everything, your carpet seas
brine my feeble, shadow-casting lesions.
                               
        Unsure if you've left me ***** or clean                 (this time)
I drag my body down your tainted hallway.
In stark fluorescence, there is no clarity
but the echoes, like reflections
of the emptiness of eve.

Blood-letter run dry
          somehow still high,
                                                ****** into the thoughtlessness
                                                 ­                                                      of
                                                              ­                                                       your
                                                                ­                                                                 ­     tides
                                                                ­                                                             (I am disregarded, but alive.)
I have recently asked a number of friends what their favorite word in the English language is. I have used each single word as a starting off point for a poem. Here is poem 1.
 Dec 2012 Caitlin Drew
C R
Trapped
 Dec 2012 Caitlin Drew
C R
Please, take my hand,
give me reason.
Let me leave my prison.
But leave me here,
and see me suffer;
Crawling amongst the dirt,
and the dust.

You watch me burn,
holding back the oceans.
I am a phoenix,
leaping through the flames:
My tears are steam,
My blood is fire,
and My resolve is slowly smoking.

For you became my escape from life,
and now life's escaping me.
Slipping through my fingers,
falling to the floor,
catching,
burning,
Gone.
 Dec 2012 Caitlin Drew
Anna
Distance
 Dec 2012 Caitlin Drew
Anna
Last day today
Saying goodbye won't be easy
how much time will I need to sacrifice
to be with you again

tomorrow will be a cold day
and December won't be lovely
without you here by my side
..until we meet again
The moment before total disaster is  surreal.
Now all I have is the shadow of her love.
It strolls the  back-roads of my desires. It smiles lovingly then vanishes
between my fingers just as warm as before.  No more.

A sad day when she was unable to play the waiting game.
Waiting for just a speck of what she gave in immeasurable
volume. Waiting.



HELLO GIRL IT'S BEEN AWHILE.
Guess you'l be glad to know That Iv'e learned how to laugh and smile.
Getting over you was slow.

They say old lovers can be good friends but
I never thought that Id see you again,
I'd really see you again.

I go crazy, when I look in your eyes
I still go crazy.
No my heart just cant hide,
that old feelin inside

way deep down inside Wo-u baby.
You know when I look in your eyes,
I go crazy.

You say he satisfies your mind.
Tells you all of his dreams. I know

how much that means to you. I
realize that I was blind, but
just when I thought I was over you.
I see your face and it just aint true.

No it just aint true, I go crazy when I look
in your eyes I still go crazy.
That old flame comes alive
it starts  burning inside
way deep down inside.
Ooh baby. You know
when I look in your eyes I go crazy.

Whoe-**. Whoe **-**.
I go crazy. You know when I look in your eyes I
go crazy.No my heart just cant hide.

That old feelin inside,way deep down inside I go crazy.
By Paul Davis.
This song is overheard but never overfelt
I went to sleep with my headset on and woke up in pain with this song playing.
If you have lived long enough, this is every man's song or will be eventually.
Give me harmony and I will build.
Tranquility will grasp hold of life;
only taking what only peace can give.
Building a life.
Give me life before you take my harmony;
Happiness will prosper.
Leave me happy.
Harmony and I will build.

Pleasure will corrupt my mind,
telling fancy tales of delight.

Let me take hold a smile,
and my fancies will make it glow.
Life grant me what I plead,
Harmony to build with.
Sometimes I wonder what my real reasons are for things, other do not know nor I.
 Dec 2012 Caitlin Drew
Leah Ward
There once was fellow
Of whom I was rather fond,
But there was such an idiosyncrasy,
That he cheerfully donned.
It was adding this boy was drawn to,
But not just numbers,
Such as two plus two,
But syllables, like bill·a·bles.

His lips would murmur
As mine would speak,
But I'd stand attentive,
Tongue in cheek.
Every syllable I would say
Would be counted
In every single way.
"Could I have a glass of water?"
"That one was eight"
"Come on," I said
"You're ruining our date."

I grew weary of having
To deal with
The incessant word adding;
And so I decided the thing to do,
Was to take it up
With my obnoxious beau.  
"What is it with the counting and computing of all my confab
It's neither dashing nor is it longer dazzling
In fact, It has turned to be rather drab."
His face contorted to the most cruel of expressions,
As his mouth went to conference one of its many confessions:
"You know babe,
Well first order is first,
That was thirty-six,
And nervously dispersed.
And secondly I must say,
When it comes to alliteration,
You tend to get a bit carried away."
"That's preposterous!" I plustered, providently provoked,
I do not choose clusters of complementary chords,
To do so would make me choke!"
As these words left my mouth as I spoke,
My beloved's face grew rather amused,
And my face flushed a fluorescent fuchsia,
When I realized his reckoned ruse.  

And so it may seem that the other
May be wrapped up in some insidious blunder,
Yet please do consider,
That you yourself can be guilty of some other habit,
In which you do plunder.
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