camouflage days,
how easily you fade

the sun hides
from the pressure of time
and change is left invisible

I take everything to heart.
That half hearted hug hangs loose on my hips.
I've been wondering around this forest with cement blocks tied to my feet
that I am simply too lazy to untie,
and I'm scared.

Every word spoken questions all i've done,
and what I'm doing.

I've fallen in love with too many people, and in that mess,
I have shattered my own heart,
and refuse to let it heal.

I can't write as beautifully as her,
but that doesn't make my words any less sincere.

In a way,
you've almost become another one of my medications,
and I hate being dependent on anything
or anyone.

I really wish that you would stop playing with me.
Although a year form now,
none of this will matter.

Autumn leaves
Are a trick of the mind.
An illusion of beauty,
That mask the harsh reality
Of what they represent.

Mesmerized by their colors
People mistake them for beauty.

But what are autumn leaves really?

They are leaves
Changing
Inevitably changing
With no control over the matter
Loosing what they once were altogether

And then
When the cold fully encompasses them
And it becomes too much to bare any longer,
The simply fall away,
Completely forgotten by the people who were once
Infatuated with their beauty
But have lost interest now
Because they are no longer
appealing to the eye.

A cigarette
Feels so warm
Like a hug from a friend
And you feel like you belong
Finally
I found where I belong
Cigarettes,
Memories kept
All my secrets
Are left on cigarettes