in class
they asked us
if we were
afraid of the dark

no i'm not afraid
of the dark that
fills my room
at two a.m.

i'm not afraid of the dark
that engulfs
underground caves
or the darkness
submerged deep in
the atlantic ocean

but
i'm afraid of the dark
that seeps through
every fissure
and crevice
of my splintered heart;
the blackness that
cascades through
my veins
and the gloom
that fills my lungs
(with no room
for oxygen.)

yes, i'm afraid
of a certain kind
of darkness:
the kind that can't
be illuminated
by a flashlight

your bitter words
felt like
heavy footprints
on my heart

i hate how i always
seem to forgot to
cherish every moment
when it occurs

i hate how i always
seem to forgot to
cherish every person
while i am loving them

so a year later,
when i look back
at those memories;
well, that's all these
places and people
become.

they become
**memories.

it is midnight on
friday and i hope she's not
thinking about him.

i am not in love,
nor am i out of love, just
stuck in the middle.

'Help, help, ' said a man. 'I'm drowning.'
'Hang on, ' said a man from the shore.
'Help, help, ' said the man. 'I'm not clowning.'
'Yes, I know, I heard you before.
Be patient dear man who is drowning,
You, see I've got a disease.
I'm waiting for a Doctor J. Browning.
So do be patient please.'
'How long, ' said the man who was drowning. 'Will it take for the Doc to arrive? '
'Not very long, ' said the man with the disease. 'Till then try staying alive.'
'Very well, ' said the man who was drowning. 'I'll try and stay afloat.
By reciting the poems of Browning
And other things he wrote.'
'Help, help, ' said the man with the disease, 'I suddenly feel quite ill.'
'Keep calm.' said the man who was drowning, ' Breathe deeply and lie quite still.'
'Oh dear, ' said the man with the awful disease. 'I think I'm going to die.'
'Farewell, ' said the man who was drowning.
Said the man with the disease, 'goodbye.'
So the man who was drowning, drownded
And the man with the disease past away.
But apart from that,
And a fire in my flat,
It's been a very nice day.

Like is a "strong" word
like like like
but really
it isn't-
it's a weak way
to express
even weaker feelings
and you're even weaker
(like me)
to avoid said feelings,
thinking that they're "bad"
or "wrong"
or "evil,"
because you're "afraid"-
of what?
Of hurt?
Of being proven incorrect,
flawed
of having to have someone
to lean on
to show problems
to trust to accept
fully
ev
er
y
thing that's wrong
with you
?
It is a scary notion,
being left out in the ocean
of feelings felt but never spoken
and further ruined
by one who was believed
to be too worthy
to be safe.