Amelia

Jun 2017

Zachary William

I remember the way
the alcohol
lubricated our words to each other
and she told me those three
poisonous words:
"I love you"
Except she added
my name to the end
to make sure I knew
how important it was.
"You're the only
person I've said that to,"
She told me that night
as we parted ways

The next day she told
me that it didn't count
and that she was being
dramatic
and I remained in place
amongst those
who function better
as shadows,
withering under her
light,
hoping to hear the
meaningless words
again.

Mar 2017

Willow-Anne

Alcoholism

She’s more fun when she is drunk
At least…until she’s not
Because she’s puking in the toilet
And regretting her last shot

She’s more confident when she’s drunk
Gorgeous and ready to score
Until she looks in a mirror
And feels even uglier than before

She likes herself more when she is drunk
Until that feeling goes away
When she is so far beyond gone
That her self-hatred comes out to play

She’s happier when she’s drunk
All her issues leave her brain
But they all come crashing back at once
And cause her so much pain

She likes the world more when drunk
It’s filled with so much good
Until one little thing sets her off
And she hates it all more than she should

She likes life more when she’s drunk
Her mind for once feels still
Terrified of losing that feeling
She soon wants to end things with a pill

But she can stop any time she wants
Or so she’d have you believe
Because alcohol makes her seem so happy
That is, until all her friends leave

Edit: (3/10/17) Oh my goodness! I haven't logged on in a couple of days and boy did I miss a lot!
I am doing my best to respond to all your messages and comments now! Sorry for the wait!
Thank you all so much for such an overwhelming amount of love and support <3 You guys are amazing
For those of you who struggle with addiction of any kind, hang in there, and I hope you all find the help and support you need <3
Best wishes to you all. And thank you again <3

Edit: (3/11/17)
Alrighty, so I just got a very long message that without going too into details accused me of poking fun at alcoholism with this poem. I would just like to be very clear that this poem was in no way inteaded to make fun of the illness that is alcoholism, and if it came off that way to anyone else, I am truely truely sorry. Words can not express that enough for I very much wished the opposite intent. Alcoholism (and addiction in general) is a very serious illness that I take very seriously. I sinceraly hope that anyone who is struggling with it gets the help they need and those of you who are in recovery, I am proud of you. Stay strong and continue to work towards it <3
Once again, my sincere apologies again to anyone who was offended.
Love to you all <3 - Willow-Anne

Sep 2016

Feliz G

Silent Voices

Don't turn to me,
when you want someone to talk to,
because you never knew me,
and I never knew you.

We don't have anything in common now that years have passed,
I've flown in my life, and so have I crashed.

I don't know much about you anymore, so don't come to me,
remember I'm just a stranger,
and forgetting you was all I need.

#past #friendship #forgotten #brokenness #fakefriends

Amelia Sep 2016

Eccedentesiasts

The happiest people are the saddest
In a world full of affliction, deceit, feign and hatred
People wear masks to cover up the bruises, tears and scars
In every person there’s a person you don’t know
The world is a circus to the masqueraded humans
No one knows what someone is truly feeling and how someone truly is
We have become so good at lying and covering up the distress that it’s become a norm and if you express your true feelings everyone runs away because fear comes hand in hand with this norm.

Amelia Jul 2016

I Lost My Smile

I used to smile all the time, all day and to everyone.
Along the path of my painful and difficult experiences I lost my smile
I have left segments of my smile in people’s lives
People who do not care to bring it back
Can I blame though? I let them take it
I let them take my smile
Their wear my smile on their faces as if it’s their own while I walk around without one
I have to make a new smile
It’s hard to because I was so used to the one I had
It was filled with genuine innocence, joy and life
Love, hope and faith
Yet now I wear a mask to cover up the non-existent smile I have
I listen to music to find my smile but I find pieces of myself rather in every song that I listen to
So I have lost my smile and myself
I don’t know who I am anymore
They took myself away from me
If I had opened my mouth and said something when I had the chance to
I’d have my smile and be myself
But here I am writing this poem, tears swelling in my eyes
My hands are cold and stiff
It’s hard to write about how I lost my smile
Will I ever get it back?
Time is going, the clock is ticking and days are passing
I am getting older and wiser yet I still have not my smile

Dear Little Child:
Do not let them take away your smile and innocence. You won’t know any better but because I have been in your shoes once upon a time I am asking you to not let them take away your life. For those are your most vulnerable and precious years and not everyone lived those years so they always want to deprive the innocent and clueless of their own years. If someone had warned me like I have warned you I would’ve lived to see your sinless face. Do not let them tell you otherwise, be who you are, be happy, live joyfully and most importantly do not them take away your smile for once it is taken you can never get it back again.