it rains hard
the barren heart
it starts to flood
house of darts

our college lists intersect
only once
and i wonder if
i can take that as a metaphor
for the way our lives
will run parallel
to each other
but never, again,
perpendicular
and i wonder if
the thought
will ever cease
depressing me.

a cup of hot tea
smells of jelly
pain on fingers
all i could think is bones
how my bones
and the sand
will be one
without said promise
it's enough like this
and how my bones
and the fishes
will talk to each other
how good the weather is
how salty the water is
oh, my bones will become
salted bones
glad there's no dog
down there

dive, dive
sink and drown
fill yourself with me, says sea,
feel me become ugly
embrace the agony
it's me, it's me

welcome home, says sand

it becomes warm

Swallow your anxiety. Gulp it down and let it pool in your gullet, clouding your mind, sticking to your guts and swarming your insides. Allow it to spill out between your clenched teeth onto the flowers below you, white worry pooling at your feet and seeping into the concrete. Let it drain and drown you, crack your back and bleed you out, because its planted on your b-side - underneath your fingernails, behind your eyes, a second skin, like sticky soap in your hair.

Midnight
  crashes in
thunderclap   headache

darkness     spreading
a virus
black   skin   infection

     hear the sea
cannot see it
mumble in   sigh out

night of sonnets
melting to   haikus
couplets     nothing

rubies on my lips
   jewels   I've never known
on my hand

     you

made me faint
   made my (day)dreams
Technicolor

whispered villanelles
     buried them
broken bones   in sand

     inhaled your language
stored stories
   for next time

twenty-six   things
twenty-six   letters
play   pause   repeat

play   pause   repeat
   craved you
smoke/drugs/*****

in eyes lost
backs of   knees
fingers on      spines

   eleven fifty nine
     fifty nine
reality soaks through

a ****** wound
   as the message
in the bottle

   you sway away
fictional     fading
   closed

do not wake me up
when i come to you
and kiss your hand
just close your eyes
and sleep
dry lips on your eyelids
not mine, not mine
i am not here
the weight you feel
the warm breath against your skin
the trembling touch on your cheek
not mine, not mine
your doubled heartbeats
caused by too much coffee
please believe me
or not
just close your eyes
just do not wake me up

they do not know you.
they only know your name,
your face, your skin,
your eyes, your fears,
your cries, your hair,
your smile, your voice,
your dreams, not you.
baby, they do not know you.
no one does; not even you.