I want to be selfish for once, to get drunk from my needs
and soak on my wants. To get high from My Love and
wrapped up on my life.

I want to be greedy at last, to drown on self love and
asphyxiate on my laughs. To be exhausted from my
joys and depleted from good vibes.

I want to be narrow minded tonight, to feel voiceless
from speaking up and drained for being who I am.

I need to be ego centered and obliterate all my flaws,
to eliminate all the stares and feel I'm above them all.
It's time to be selfish and begin to live for me, they all
have their lives on play while mine's stuck on repeat.

I yearn for the one I've never met .
I miss you without having seen your face.
I long for your voice, which my ears have
never heard. All I see are stares but I can't see
your eyes. Your smell is my favorite scent,
one I wish I could recall. You're a petal and
Christmas in may. A song I listen to but that
hasn't been written. You are a walk by the
beach which pavement is being built.

I was told once that I lived a former life as a nun
I liked the thought
It rang true in my heart.
But what about this other one that keeps showing up in my dreams?

Where I  smoked virginia slims
Danced nights in a hazy dive bar
Black hair
A luscious mystery

Mainstreet by Bob Seger
That'll take you there.

Oh, and please, I would like if you trusted in me
to discern imagination
From a soul memory

I still drift back to one song I heard  years back.
See  
I had me a "come-to-Jesus" moment
When you opened your mouth to sing.
I mean ****
I confess
Since that night I've wanted to get next to you

Tell you about the time I was in the crowd
All ****** and hazy
Then your voice rang out
I sat up in my seat, leaned in
Suddenly awake
and utterly
Stupefied.

The wind howls
outside my bedroom window
shaking me
my heart; my soul

it screams
while you sit there
drinking sweet-smelling coffee
a baby boy in Africa
cries of hunger
and aching ribs.

while you are curled up
under warm and soft blankets
an old and lonely man
wanders the darkest streets
looking for warmth;
a home

while you hide there
surrounded by light and family
with an aura of ungratefulness
you are lost in the rays of your technologies
with a frown on your angelic face
when a weeping woman
shakes and prays
for her gone children to reach Heaven happily
but you dare forget God to a screen?

my house shakes
from Wind's agonizing words
and a streak of cold
trickles into my haven
along with the words
"what am I doing?"

somehow
my stiff legs reach
a window
and the arms in front of me
pull it open
to reveal no sound at all

where is the wind?
did he leave just as
he touched
my heart; my soul
making me waver?
or does a gust not howl ,
speak,
and isn't heard?

no
the wind was here
for how else did the once-twinkling snowflakes
suddenly freeze
and lose all of their beauty?

no one but Wind
would take the innocence
of such young and beautiful white specks
just as they landed
in this cold,
dark world

no one but Wind
would flare you with reality
enough to make you cry with obliviousness
for this wind; my Wind
he is the voice off all those
who have faced
life's stinging brutality;
him
instead of
hiding under covers
and whispering morbid lies
that
everything is okay

Bright star, would I were steadfast as thou art—
    Not in lone splendour hung aloft the night
And watching, with eternal lids apart,
    Like nature's patient, sleepless Eremite,
The moving waters at their priestlike task
    Of pure ablution round earth's human shores,
Or gazing on the new soft-fallen mask
    Of snow upon the mountains and the moors—
No—yet still steadfast, still unchangeable,
    Pillow'd upon my fair love's ripening breast,
To feel for ever its soft fall and swell,
    Awake for ever in a sweet unrest,
Still, still to hear her tender-taken breath,
And so live ever—or else swoon to death.