Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
alexis hill Apr 2016
above the city
contemplating the ideation of love
drinkin brews on the skyline
cradling the universe in my palm
I'm not home but I am worldly
as this is mine

what I love about traveling
is that there is the option
an option to question life
that pondering on how forgiveness takes time
that resentment and irresponsibility
may not ever be forgiven
it is unfortunately untimely

that in all honesty,
not all can heal according
to ones hourglass

be patient
this world is all we get
there is not reset button
the chances- we get one

so if we question the potential of the world
why not question ourselves?
are we accountable?
have we already assumed our problems
our mistakes that vindicate who we are?

are we love?
do we use love as self defense instead of
a weapon as we wish?
how do we save each other knowing
that love is not a weakness
but the strength within us to reveal

our darkest secrets and our
lightest atonements
how do we tell the world that we want it?
and that we want the world to want us?

like, we the people
want the world wants us
like we
want the world.
alexis hill Mar 2016
follow Alice
crawl down the rabbit hole
it's a black abyss with all these hurt and hatred lies tied to my mind so it melds
into my memories

pick a drink of your choice
for a decision to make you tall or small
till you aren't sure you who are at all
a mad hatter?
that's mad
must of made me mad
but doesn't matter

because the hookah smoking caterpillar
offers me a drag
hazy plume of smoke through blurry eyes
and then the queen screams
"off with her head"

steals from the psyche so I'm late
I'm late for a very important date
Shouldn't have left resting lashes
or closed lids- it's all Wonderland

and now I'm stuck in a fantasy
didn't ask for what was handed me
I missed the last waking of this dream
now I've lost touch with all reality
alexis hill Mar 2016
I have to say in truth
this only happens when
loneliness and lost hope intertwines
trying to see through the tears in those eyes

can feel it inside
blooming in the mind
recreated replicated and reopened wounds such an evil intricate design

sliding into the abyss
emptiness darkness
won't find solace
at the bottom of the bottle
but give me another

every memory slips through
the cracks and escapes
like the lakes that pour from
a painful face

trace expressionless emotions
the tears in those eyes turn to hate
loneliness becomes bitterness
hope grows thorns to spread universal hate

this only happens when life
doesn't always turn out how it's planned
to be and one day at a time in
this intricate tangled web of a place

embrace the will to untie
try to make the knot final when
the strings of this puppetry
won't undo
that's all I can say when this happens
in truth.
alexis hill Mar 2016
would you shoulder the hurt and fight the demons?
seems to quiet the hell
takes that pain away
except it's only momentarily

why?
why?
because I want to grow some wings
and fly

yet they might be clipped
so what lies above me whatever higher power is out there
sweet power I ask of thee
stop the suffering
put an end to me and give me peace

why?
why?
because I want to grow some wings
and fly

I know all of this is slowly killing my memory
destroying everything
for good reasons maybe
to shield me from the truth

I use what I find from what
every woman man and child has
left behind
to rebuild a heavenly shrine

why?
why?
because I want to grow some wings
and fly

there must be a reason that I still exist
for every slice of the wrist
hanging noose dangling loose waiting
but I'm alive and some day I will be free

if I wasn't meant for anything
then they would have killed me
there must be a reason I still breathe
I'll embrace myself love myself and
Ima do my best to accept reality

why?
why?
because I want to grow some wings
and fly

I'm afraid I don't have the tools to
rebuild a new me
life doesn't always turn out
how it's planned to be

but aside of what's been handed to me
I know I'm the only one who can bring happiness to let it be
I know I'm the only one
who can set me
free...
alexis hill Mar 2016
Even on those nights I want to let go
I recall when I almost took my existence
Ponder how even one breath is so precious
How much it takes to live in the present
And yet how //

This will all be worth it.

As if to say,
"You have the strength// so put it to use."
If you can't see through it
You most likely never will have the vision
With the saline and blurry eyes
You are too blind to ever see this

To look through the lens of my sole purpose
But thats alright; I understand
Just step aside
So I can lift others
Who deserve it
alexis hill Feb 2016
wake the **** up
as if apathy is
more than half of me
casually this takes lives

and I'm another common casuality
"the poor me" type of tragedy

no you're sleeping
yeah you wish you were just dreamin
sittin on cloud 9
passin time with time

I'm trying to find the type of
"showin up for life"
kind of mentality
I want to exchange these flames for a halo

no you're not sleeping
wake the **** up
yeah you wish you were dreamin
I'm running out of patience
wake the **** up

next year I might be 23
not much to show for all of it
dually noted- I want to make a difference
so I'll have no regrets when I'm lying
on that bed losing consciousness and dyin

but I'm alive now right?
I must have meaning
but feels like
where ever I am
sunshine or snow

all the seasons go
I guess I was in it
- into some *******, for all the
wrong reasons

it's always the reasons
and reasons
are just masked excuses
I don't understand your language
HUH?

speak the **** up
and stop it
get the **** up
stop drowning is self doubt
just stop it
pick yourself the **** up
stop this

no you're not sleeping
wake the **** up
yeah you wish you were dreamin
I'm running out of patience
wake the **** up
alexis hill Feb 2016
Believe me

I don't want to get deep.

I only want to

keep my head above water.
Next page