and I am screaming as loudly and silently as i can
and i am crying as hard as i can with out letting a tear slip down my check

smile for a picture
pose with your brother
be a good sister
wake up your mother
clean up the mister
our family isn't as perfect as it seems it is

I want the world for you

But I'm still scared for us
Each day is coming closer to knowing you

and everyday I'm praying to a god that i know is not real
praying that i will be what you need
praying that i can truly know you

i want you to be happy
i never want you to cry
i don't want you to have depression
i don't want you to feel pain like i have

and i'm scared people will say your not worth it
but you are you are priceless
and i will never stop loving you

I will give you everything
my dying wish is you will be happy

Because you are my child, my baby, my life, a little piece of my soul.

that day everyone ignored me
i couldn't see
i pretended i was fine till the night
where i wouldn't put up a fight

so i went down to the ocean
just going through the motion
i took all the pills i could find
it seemed fine in my mind

it was late
and i wanted this to be fate
i was full of hate

so i swam out as far as i could
more then i should
i let go of all my breath
so i could seek my death
i swam down
i was in a well known Florida town

and i smiled as my vision turned black
and slipped through the crack

but i woke up!
i had only managed to sip from death's cup
and i screamed from anger
and i was alive
it was all for nothing, that dive
i didn't want this life anymore
i was curled up on the beach floor
wanting to to slip through life's door

but that day everyone ignored me wouldn't be the last

Death doesn't scare me
It doesn't make me want to flee
It doesn't scare me,death
Or how I wont take another breath
Death itself doesn't put fear in me
But what dose scare me,
I will explain so you can see

You see I know my fate
Every time I ate,
Every time I loss and gained weight,
Every time I felt hate,
I knew how it would happen

It scares me shitless
How I won't have a witness
To the pain I feel
And can't heal.

I was angry, sad and ******
That I slit my own wrist!

I hate her this girl
And her pearl
She doesn't think we know
She doesn't think it shows
But I'll **** that girl
Her life will end in a swirl

But as I realize that girl I hate so much
Is me, and I couldn't even stand a light touch

But death doesn't scare me
It doesn't make me want to flee
But oh,I'm scared so scared
But what of?
I'm scared of me...

And it was like an addiction
Who cares about affliction?
Running through my veins
Running through my mind
Holding  me in chains
Making me blind.

But it was an addiction
I couldn't even give you a depiction
Every second on my mind
Wasn't very kind.
I was an addict
It was my addiction

It was an addiction
I'll give you a prediction
I used to be a star
Now i have a scar
Don't follow this white rabbit
It will become a habit.

I first saw her when I was a young kid
she didn't see me because I hid
She was very pretty
but looked at everyone with pity
she was so small
yet she was so tall
she didn't know me
but she could
and she would

we were now teens
where i could be seen
i wanted help
i hated myself
but she was there
she told me what to wear
she said we were friends
till the end

she saw how i thought i was fat
said she would help me get flat
it will be a big fray
but do as i say
she told me

eat less she said
you wont have dread.
lose more weight
you already ate
your so close
pretty like a rose.

just like a rose in a flash of red
i was dead
i was so light
not daring to take a single bite
i was gone
just before dawn.
the self hate was still there
Ana didn't seem to care.

she stood next to the grave
there the last gift she gave
a wicked smile
and took another name from the file.

this was her plan all along
a long twisted song
it was so wrong
now i'm gone
because of that self made demon spawn.
Ana Anorexia has killed me.

Mom and dad left when i was young
Brother and sister left when i sung
Friends left when i had pride
You left when i cried
I left when i died