That feeling where your stomach drops and your heart sinks
The moment you realize I was not meant for you and I think
I realized before and lied to myself for the hopes of having a family
And understanding you were not meant for me
Every lie is a dagger in my face
You’ve spilt the insides
What’s left for me

The Cardinal visits in the morning.
The Dove in the afternoon.

Each passing reminds me of you.

I don’t know why nature ignites my memory.
I wish you could tell me.

I hate when they say,
“ Now, you truly look happy!”
You never saw me then