Love is a game
Of tic tac toe,
Constantly waiting
For the next X or O

There is this part of me ,
Crying out loud,
And another part of me,
That had enough.

I miss you,
even when your face rests in front of mine.
I'm jealous,
Even though I was the one to tear us apart.
I should have kept trying to fall for what was already mine.

You were such a Lion Hearted Girl.
How do I stop feeling this way.
stop the guilt and the longing.
You never apologized for how you felt,
Life was tough, but so were you.
You were so harsh and sharp,
yet when you spoke to me you became malleable and soft.
God I miss you, but i didn't when you were mine.
Which is a sign as clear as any other...

When trouble
  Assails,
   Then
  Even storms
Raging and
  Fierce cannot
   Alarm.
  Loving, merciful
Lord
Secures.

Hospitalized February 6th
"It's pneumonia and Influenza A," she said the next morning.
"They want you and the boys tested. Love you; see you later."
We did not speak again for six weeks.

Lungs and kidneys quit February 7th,
placed on complete life support, and coma induced.
I am quarantined with flu and cannot visit.
Doctor calls, "She's not likely to make it. This is the worst I've seen."

Allowed to visit February 10th,
informed, "We almost lost her last night. She had a heart attack. I
must be honest with you; I've never had a patient in her condition
survive."

I thank the doctor for his candor, add, "If it is her time to go, then we will find a way to go on, but..." and he turns to me...
"we have thousands of people around the world praying for her."
"Then I will add my prayer, too," he said.

Doctor calls February 11th.
Reassures, "She's fine,  don't worry. I go off-shift tomorrow.
I think your prayers are working.
For the first time since I attended her, I think she's going to make it."
I believe him. I thank him, hang up, and cry.

Each step of the way she shatters expectations.
Surviving. Breathing. Walking.
"Expect months in the hospital." It was weeks.
"Expect months of dialysis, maybe a year, maybe a transplant." Kidneys recovered.

Thousands prayed, many gave, the Lord answered with a Yes.
In our deepest darkness, he carried us again, teaching us to trust always.
Next week, she goes back to work.
Once again, the Lord gave me my wife, my miracle.