I wish nothing more
than to feel something,
anything, really.
Whether it be sorrow,
sinking in my stomach.
Or anger and rage,
my blood boiling.
Perhaps nervousness,
shaky hands and sweaty palms.
Even fear,
my heart beating rapidly.
Why not disgust,
how wrong and twisted.
Surprise me,
oh how unexpected.
Anticipation,
I really cannot wait.
Maybe even joy,
though I doubt such happiness
will fall upon me.