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She listens to the music of the world
The chirping of the birds
The whoosing of the winds

She listens to the music of life
Of the chatter of voices
Laughs and giggles of children

She listens to the music of love
Whispered 'I love yous'
Warm embraces

She listens to the music of pain
Tear-choked voices
Heartbreaking screams

She listens to the music of anger
Roaring fights
Searing slaps

She listens to the music of heartbreak
Sobs wracking her body
Shattering glass
The little girl looked at her reflection

Perfecting an exquisite facade



The young girl looked at her reflection

Poking at her chubby cheeks and sunken eyes



The teenage girl looked at her reflection

Happy with her sunken cheeks and concealed eyes



The teenage girl looked at her reflection

Practising her smile

It does not reach her eyes

The teenage girl looked at her reflection

In the toilet the water was clear

She loved how her cheek bones were noticeable

Like they could tear through her skin



The teenage girl looked at her reflection

A grimace on her face

Hand pushing into her already small stomach



The teenage girl looked at her reflection

Sunken Eyes

Sunken Cheeks

Finally perfect

Until the next week that is



The little girl looked at her reflection in the mirror
The thoughts spilled from their head

Like milk from a jug

The thoughts floated out of their head

Like bubbles, waiting to be popped

The thoughts flew out of their head

Like butterflies in a meadow



The looks taunted them

Everyone looking at them as if they were a freak

Just choose one, just choose one you, FREAK!

A shudder ran down their spine, tears tickling at their eyes

The name, the name it taunted them

The name they were given at birth

The name that made them sick when being called it

You're a girl, a girl, or do you wanna be a boy now, huh?

No, no they don't wanna be a boy now

And they were never a girl, everyone just assumed
The ground splinters under her feet
The weight on her shoulders pushing her further into the ground
The ground drops from under her
Falling, her skin flakes
Flaking away with the force of the air
She falls.

She is in her room
Facing her mirror
Eyes brimming with tears
Cracks trailing around her face and body
She turns away
She covers the cracks with hooded jackets and perfect smiles.

She lands.

In the darkness
She feels the cracks covering her
Like a cloak
She crumbles.

She stands.

She's in her room.
Looking in the mirror
The cracks cover her now
The perfect cracks
She smiles and the cracks glow.

She flies.
A girl sits in a room
A laptop in front of her
Her fingers hover over the keys
The light shines through her glasses
Which are smudged from the long day
The tears brim at her eyes
Blinking them away
Trying not to crumble
Trying to stay on track

A girl is touched on the arm by her grandmother
She flinches away
Her arm tingles where she is touched
"What is wrong with you?"
Lingers in the air
"You are crazy,
you are not normal,
there is something wrong with your head"
She stands and walks away
She walks to the stairs and cries

What is wrong with the ******* the stairs
With the bleeding mind
And the stuttering heart
And the twisting stomach
I am her
with shoulder-length hair
and sinking eyes

I am him
with shoulder-length hair
and terrible posture
and tired, sinking eyes

I am them
with shoulder-length hair
and splitting headaches
and warm blankets
and shaking hands
and fear

and empty, tired sinking eyes
He carved him out of marble,
every curve and point

He built him from damaged stone
Chisels at the ready,

Breaking away insecurities and imperfections

He smoothed his skin with tender hands

His caresses whispered words of love and pride

His masterpiece,
created from the magic of his hands

From his subtle movements,
his caring touches

They travelled through the streets at nightfall
hiding from those who disagreed
those who threw stones and venomous words

His life work
Mounted on a pedestal for all to see
For all to touch and damaged and ruin

His celestial man,
made perfect
 Jun 2018 Lorenzo Neltje
Bailey
Sea
 Jun 2018 Lorenzo Neltje
Bailey
Sea
I feel heavy
As I drift
In the sea
That I bleed
Down I go
To drown alone
In this sea
I made for me
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