i made a mistake today.
and yesterday. do you know what i did? i turned a blind eye to your mistakes. i shouldn't have, but my feelings for you seemed to matter more so i didn't stop myself from thinking you were perfect and i didn't stop myself from falling too deep by the time i realised how deep i was in i was already drowning maybe if i was physically drowning someone would have saved me maybe it could hav even been you. but i was in over my head and stopped listening to my heart i guess it didn't matter in the end when it all fell apart
when the soldier left from home,
he hugged his wife and cradled his child he left the house with metal slung over his torso and boarded the ship full of alike thoughts, not ready and never will be prepared for this move they landed on the ground and felt the new air already declaring in mind their love for this miss wasn't as great as the other but alas, they had to make do and as decades went on, they were still engaged to this new miss, some managed to live on to stay on it but most went out under it
When the clock strikes 5, I get up and sit outside. I count the people that walk past me, I hear the words that they speak. It makes no sense, Why people want other's pain, If I were them, I'd not feel sane. That is why I wish for a peaceful meal, And a day that wouldn't involve kills. I want to reach home, Without a hole in my heart, And want to stay instead of falling apart. Is it so hard, To find what I desire? I think it is, Because I always feel tired. When the people finally go away, I stand up and go inside my 'home', praying to make it alive today.
I felt like a doll,
emotionless and all. I was able to move and talk and think but, I'm not there, not really. I looked out of the window and watched the people on the streets. Some looking happy and excited, whereas some looked bleak. I felt like a layer of glass was seperating me from the world. It was hard to explain but what I wanted to do was for someone to help me. They'd ask me if I was okay and I would look at them and say, "No. Not really." But I know they'd flinch away from the fact and silently roll their eyes, That I was another lying person, Who would fake a smile but have problems for miles. This time, however, it's a little different. For I'm the person who helped others who fell, When I'm the one who needed saving most of all.
Why didn't you listen?
It would've been better if you did- When we'd go to the fairs, I'd say, "Let's go onto the rides." And you would look at me with disbelief and say, "No. Let's stare at the lights." When we'd go to parties, you would pretend I wasn't there. When I'd ask if you wanted to go out, you'd say, "I don't have any time." When I asked you for money, you would say, "I won't spare you a dime." Look at where we are now. You, standing on the ground while I stare you down.
What could the light show me?
I had nothing I wanted to see- I had love and hope and faith and trust 'till she, crushed my dreams- I could still believe and maybe succeed but I was still stuck in this place in my mind and I couldn't even breathe- I tried to escape, from my cell but I What could the light show me? I had nothing I wanted to see- I had love and hope and faith and trust 'till she, crushed my was prevailed, and soon found- Maybe if I didn't decide to give up, I would have lived- Maybe if I realised my mistake, I would have another chance to see- My regret was a strong as the burning pain in my heart- Yearning for something as long gone as my life- I remained in my still, quiet cell, knowing I wasn't worth well- No one will save me- No one will care- For I would drown in my own despair- I asked another question, in my head,why had I looked for the light when it was already dead? Time ran, stripping me of its knowledge- Until one day,I saw the flicker of a light- It wasn't so bright but it allowed me to finally see a life- I stood up from my corner to run towards it with a beating heart- I stood up to run towards my future, with strangely not a heavy heart.
I think of chances like little rain drops- The moment you let go of a chance and let it slip away, is like the moment when you do not manage to catch the rain drop and it falls onto the ground- Chances came by so frequently yet either we overlook it or we let it fall through our own hands- Chances could fall right onto our laps and we choose to ignore it- Chances could appear out of nowhere and it's always you to decide to use it or not- Maybe that is why I am indecisive... chances are precious and I never want to pick the wrong one- Chances open up new pathways to unimaginable experiences and teach you lessons and make you learn and feel so much- Chances are like rain drops, they fall past you without you noticing sometimes and you lose them, just like that- Chances and opportunities are so common yet we so often either overlook it, do not see it or won't use it- Why won't you take that chance and just do it?