I had a dream about you
and now all I can think about is empty cups
and branches without leaves
and the blank sky during the new moon.
I wish I could talk about the way
you make me forget I'm sick
and how tonight I want to be around you
because that's when things are kelly green instead of navy blue.

forward forward forward
going somewhere moving forward
whether progressing or regressing
growing or unlearning
coming or going
living, dying
everyone believes they are moving towards something
and as everything happens all at once
each perceptive reality is entirely different than any other
and each consciousness travels, and does, and is.
each consciousness believes it has a purpose or a path.
the purpose is not to see into nor plan the future.

from the civilian to the hero tv shows and movies
have consistently glorified the ability to see visions of the future
generally this is followed by someone trying to prevent
the happenings in said vision from becoming reality
and distinctly failing because they "saw into" the future
that their own energy influenced

but the true super power is to be able to look into the past.
to prevent the omitting of details and data
to avoid a rewrite of our conscious interaction with this planet
not to white out the chapters that bear the truth in the textbooks
to recall history so it does not repeat itself

my question is then
do people disguise the wrongdoings of those hidden by the passing of time?
because they are ashamed of the mistakes of their ancestors pasts?
because they are ashamed of their participation in past consciousness's?
because they are ashamed of the atrocities humans have inflicted upon each other and themselves as well as their home planet since the beginning of recorded time here?

or do those who have the power to omit and hide history
purposely rewrite it?
do they mask the pains of the past so the rest of us will forget?
so that even they can forget?
so their next consciousness can unknowingly, while predestined,
have hand in crimes against the world all the same as committed in the lost past?

how many times has someone written these words
or a similar combination
only to delete the post?
burn the pages?
backspace the message?
stop themselves from speaking them aloud?
cover the symbols?
pass out of conscious living mid sentence?
lose them to a past lifetime?

how many times has this cycled through the same way?
how many times have I been me?
how many times have you been me?
how many times have I been anyone?
how many times have I been?

is there a rhythm or is it all as scattered and random
as the thoughts that bring you
to this kind of an understanding of the habit of misunderstanding?
the kind of thoughts that bring you back to the birds nest because you were too early for even the worm?

they will all catch up eventually
after all they all think theyre moving forward
and they don't even know where they've been.
they don't even know that they've been.

They say I was built to aid them, so they congregate daily to make use of me.
When my legs can no longer support myself as well as their needs, I will be gone.

                                                                  //A table's understanding of purpose

(no hard feelings)

You read a poem aloud about the word bible. You speak of your eyes rolling back and as I watch your lips release these heavy words, you captivate me further and further. By a minute from now I will forget to regret the addictions we've formed together. I wonder if this is how religion began; how they sat and penned a holy book. And I want to know then who our god is...but tonight I think we both know.

What do you think
of the blood in the sink?
Did you think you could climb out your veins?
Would leaving your being
give a new meaning
to the vessel that will remain?
This is the day
they will look back and say
is the one that started "the change".
And they'll all find
at the end of their time
that you were the one who was sane.

(They were too full to open their brains,
so now they take the blame.
Wisdom and Light are mistaken for Lunacy,
I'll follow this, while you follow me.)

please don't blame yourself
nothing was up to you
you cry for days and days
but there was nothing you could do
please don't hurt yourself
I cant bear to watch you bleed
someone so true and pure
should never feel this harsh defeat
you never did a thing
to warrant all this pain
you don't deserve the thunder
and you don't deserve the rain
ive never been a rhymer
ive never been much good at all
but I promise you my angel
I will never let you fall
I will repair your quiet breaks
I will never leave your side
I wont ever make you wait
ill be here til the day I die
I wont let you be alone
even when you try to hide
I wont let you take this blame
I don't care how hard you try
you dont just twinkle like the stars
youre the sunrise in my sky
youre the most vibrant flower
youre the day and youre the night
please dont blame yourself
there is nothing left to do
but be calm and understand
the one who matters now is you.

pull out your eyelashes
imagine pinching yourself repeatedly but not feeling a thing
stare at the tail lights of the car ahead until your eyes are crying but you're still not
chew a mouthful of sand
put ice cubes in your pockets and let them melt there
pour paint over your head while wearing your favorite shirt
break a nail and let it catch on all of your tights
close your hair into the car window
trip into ****** knees stay there and don't get up

don't get up