The vase broke when they said
You left.

Picture me
In a desert
Long from where you are, love
Grains of sand in my shoes
Like him, hurting the soles of my feet
Sun rays beaming on my back
It's the only way I feel warmth anymore
Sweat drips down my collarbone
This is where I belong

Picture me
In your backyard
Long from where you are, love
Thin branches from your tree
Leaves rustling in the gray hued sky
Stars have not emerged yet
Like my mind, blank and dull
Reaching for the spaces between your fingertips
Will I always be alone here?

Picture me
In front of you
Long from where you are, love
I don't exist to you
And how do I make the throbbing go away?
I jump in black holes to be
Stretched out, limb by limb
Just to have
A word
With you.

But you'll never know me, love.

Did I leave all of those women
a sacrifice
should I believe all of the judgement
paralyzed
the lies in all of the eyes I've slid by
embraceable
the saliva I've slid across the skin of too many women
overflow
losing myself in flesh just to be able to bear with...
life

I was in a six car collision
there was an executive decision made
to execute an evacuation of a body done with precision
by helicopter excision to division this family
and make a permanent revision to the vision held.

It's probable my daddy was being taken to a hospital
but he could have been going on a popsicle ride
to a proverbial icicle ride in the sky for that's all I knew of flying
volatile tears that never healed unstoppable fears.

Hands wonder to warm places,
eyes closed and pleasure building.
It's just an innocent stroke.

But his voice sets my skin on fire,
and I can feel it building.
His hushed commands leaving me wanting more.

I want to be good but I can't help myself.
Fingers sliding faster,
My body responds eagerly to it's rhythm.
Pleasure builds as his voice sets me on edge.

Please can I burst now?
As he grants permission I erupt,
toes curling and breathless.
I lose myself,
lingering for a moment between gasping fireworks and bliss.

Morning breaks with the sunlight peeking through the curtain.
Light stretches it's way across the room,
blinding and beautiful.

Reaching for him,
I need him close because time won't last.
This isn't reality,
we have been tinkering with hour glasses.
Finally able to pause the world.

My head swims as I inhale his scent.
I had to much to drink last night,
dive bars and napkin poetry set the tone.
Adventures and exploration,
ending with erupting satisfaction.

I've been swept away,
lost and entangled in the bedsheets.
One earring missing,
my bare skin pressed to him.

I don't want to leave this room,
but check out is soon and we can't linger much longer.
He was mine for a moment,
tucking another secret behind sealed lips,
and trying to get a grip on my beating heart.

I'm standing here,
not knowing what to say.
It seems to escape me now.
Losing it through fingers clenched to tight.

I'm standing here,
but you don't see me anymore.
It's fading beyond my grasp,
soon left to be polished memories and stale perfume.

I'm standing here,
fighting the impulse to run,
Not knowing what to do...
Feet frozen from backward thoughts that fill me with doubt.

I'm standing here,
and I have no idea why.
Just a naive girl with bare feet,
and hair let free.
Wondering why the wind keeps whispering your name.

Exhausted yet I carry on, boots grind with each heavy step I take. I trudge through bones of fallen men, whose hearts I had to break.

Wings that used to carry me, now lay as a reminder on my back. Haunted by the ghosts of lovers, who once counted all I lack.

The wind whispers names of honorable men, who survived yet I left broken. Names not worthy of my poisoned lips, that have parted but not since spoken.

Beautiful in reflection, but color fails to hide. This heart of frost that beats within, that so long ago shattered inside.

They stand in line and follow me, yet I tell them with regret from the start. If this was a fairytale, I'd be that twisted witch without a heart.

I saw it twinkling in the night, so I reached up towards the sky. I wanted so badly to catch it in my hands, but the universe wouldn't yet comply.

I thought of words that made my heart skip, but none more then the ones you said. Stars so brightly circle me, possibilities fill my pretty head.

Scattered about so endlessly, astrology beyond what I can see. If I catch this shooting star, maybe fate will leave us be.

It passes by a moon we share, that casts an eerie glow. Mystics relics can't reveal, something our hearts already know.

I close my eyes and catch that star, plucked it from the night. Now I Kneel on bended knee, wishing with all my might.