Destiny. Is that all i have, was i predisposed to write a song, try my hardest but still fail, like a small dog, chasing his tail. In the music industry, 6 to 1,and I know i can grow and the whole world will see. But my chains still follow, and i'm tired of it, but i can't help, but remember my past. I don't want to count on this poem getting big, and that be the only way i eat. Born a coward, will i always be?

No, my destiny isn't me, i'm a beautiful creation, and i'm being set free. Away from the darkness, away from evil, away from hopelessness, away from she. Put my fingers on a pen or a pencil, and write me heart, best as i can, to the point where the world will finally see me for what i am. A Lion, hoping for a chance at life, then BAM! There, away, goes all my pain and strife.

I was never born to be content, always believed i would greater, a singer, song
writer, and author, so call me a verbal slayer. I know that some just won’t believe, and that’s their destiny, to lack a future where they have someone as awesome as me! But if they lack me, they never had the need, and that's just fine, I'll see them when we’re freed from this mortal seed.

But the lights go out, now I wait for them to dim. I want to make it big, but so far, all i do is sin. And i'm out of place and out of fashion, running last in a race that aint lasting…. I need a leader, need a guide, need a Jekyll to my Mr. Hyde! Need something to hold onto, some sort of mental clarity, but things like that, in this cruel world, are a ******* rarity.

So I slam on the breaks and out the car I go. And i fall and fall till I land in a blanket of beautifully ruined snow. There is no oasis, and there is no way to be set free. No peace of mind…. Not for me. Nor anyone else that chases happiness or bliss. Because, eventually you’ll all fall into the snow filled with ****.

I've begun to realize, how ironic my own life has become. A **** ton of pain, ha ha, now isn't that fun. It's a self destructive barrel of hate that can't chose a side… so it jokes about its own suicide. I'm not an atheist, but I don't believe in God. I've seen too much, been through too much, to the point it makes my heart stop. Echos against the cave wall, we're slowly nearing the river. While digging my own grave, the world has become so much clearer. And music is no longer art, so many revert back to poetry, I've given up on love, i’d prefer some Jasmine tea. Hurt so many people I care for, before the yonder window breaks. And I'm now in a sea, filled with liars, filled with fakes. Isn’t that just the most manic thing you've ever heard? Young man throwing a fit through life, attention completely undeserved. But i guess that explains the ******* generation, old folks blame the tech, I blame the ******* medication. Or maybe the people, cause we’re all ******* toxic, all we want to do is start fights and talk ****!

Getting heated, setting up the next verse, stretching my fingers, prepped to be taken away in that black Hearse. But I enjoy the feeling of being put behind bars, but i'll eventually need to come out to see the stars! Revving engines, getting ready for a ready for a round 3, all right world, ******* come at me! Few are even to worthy, don't get ******, you have to understand what I’m saying first, to be properly dissed... I just want to escape what feels like an endless cycle, just want to realize, that's my real in life, no more living just for survival. Wanna be happy, and soar among the clouds, be surrounded by my family, have them finally be proud. Want to live just for me, and not for anyone else! That's not a selfish wish, it's perfect in itself! Colors surround me, and all that i own. Perhaps, Heaven, could be my new home.

I
                  
                  HATE
Writing the same **** **** every day.

                              MAKES
Me feel like I'm on ******* replay!

                                             BUT
This is the only way I know how to express my love!

                                                      LOVE
Is all i don't believe in, sort of.

                                                                  THAT'S
Fine because is still don't even know if I'm going to make it!

                                                                                 I
Cry because that's all I have left in my frail body to do.

                                                                                      GAVE UP
On everything, there's no point of life, endless void, filled with....

PAIN AND STRIFE, ******* FOR MAKING ME FEEL THIS WAY, I HATE EVERY BIT OF YOU GO AWAY, AND DON'T COME BACK AGAIN ANY DAY.
                                  
                                                         ****

Met a Girl, fell in love.
Had enough faith, to call her my dove.
So it hurt so much, when she kissed another man…
I guess this is all just part of God's plan.

That was your first mistake,
Love isn't real, and neither is heartache,
But continue believing, i would love to see your “heartbreak”!
  ***** relationships, and forget about the give and take!
I hate her, and soon, you will too.
Just thinking of her, leaves our fists black and blue.

But she felt so right, to the point where now everything feels wrong.
Our little dove, caught up in another’s birdsong…
How can you not tremble when you remember her leaving?
Or the way, soon after, we began crying, chest heaving.
Your anger is just another form of passion!
You did love her, in a fashion!

Shut your mouth, that's your fault, you promised it would work out,
Talking about women, something you know nothing about.
Your a liar, and all you want is to feed your own ego!
So, i hope you know you hurt both us and Leo!

Sometimes, in love, your bound to get hurt.
Not everything is logical, and you can’t always be on high alert.
But I love you, Left Brain, with all of my heart.
Let’s dust ourselves off, and begin to restart.

Untitled Document. What a strange set of words, that speaks to me oh so completely, like the druid doth a bird. Now, I get quite lost in words such as these, for I know not what i am either. But the fact that i can help you, Untitled Document, means quite a bit to me. Means i can, form and shape you, and make you as I please. Tell you the stories of your brothers and sisters, who already have great success in this world. But what will you be? That is a question, i truly sit here and ponder, for i think i know half your destiny as it is! You were created to be special, for success! And I know, Good Mr. Document, you’ll make it in this world, all you need is a few more t’s, maybe the word flower, leave you alone for a minute or two, up to an hour. And keep crafting my most special mix i have yet to make. Writing is easy, all you need to know is how to bake.

Orphan. This word makes the least sense of all to me, to never “make sense”, to not quite “belong”. Because even when i was getting beaten by my dad, or hit by my stepmom, i knew still there was love, just a lot of hurt feelings. My words can be like venom, and now I do see clearly, what’s it like. Because life moves on. Dad gave up, found a new wife, new Mom. But i guess i don’t belong in that picture perfect family. Way too many issues, even talking to me seems to be a calamity. So i got kicked to the curb, tossed aside like a mutt. But i still realize the love, he didn't wanna give up. But my Aunt, wonderful lady, told me things, that forever freeze my heart. Made me realize i was just a lost kid, orphan, right from the start. Mom is afraid to see me, scared i'll start a fight. And, like he does with girls, this Christmas he took her side.

Suicide. Standing between life and death isn’t fun. Joke’s over, we laughed, but now can this be done? I’m tired of hating myself, while doing nothing wrong. My god, if this keeps up, one shot with this revolver and I'll be gone. It’s confusing, walking the valley of death. Putting on a brave face, so no one thinks your scared. I’ve done it all before. Don’t think your alone, or that i love you, you disgusting *****! Sorry… Sometimes, i just get angry, and scared, and lonely, and Jesus ******* Christ! This is what you wanted, wasn’t it? For me to be exposed, to feel lost, and hopeless. Well, I got what you deserve, you miserable wretch! Now leave me be, as I pull out the gun, **** it, two shots in my head will put me back in my place. ******* God, I’m like a rabbit running the turtles race. History says I’ll lose, but I believe if I believe, for it’s too late, to turn back, and run, cry, that perhaps I have an infinitesimal, that means almost ******* impossible chance… To live. To laugh. To love. To be happy. To be wanted. To want. To breath. To breath.
To breath.

The world is super ******* frightening, I'm scared of it all,
And I’m so high off fear, and about 4-6 adderall.
So keep to myself, stay quiet, and stand real tall,
Man, hope I don't get shot…

Is life really that serious, I don’t know…
But i feel like a toddler, trying to run half-time show.
Or maybe that’s all i want, and aspire to be,
But, thing is, can’t tell if I can run, or am even up on my feet.

I can't pretend to be thugged out, or a G.
I’m just stupid *** original me!
I escalate nothing to something, yet still act carefree,  
And am completely unbeneficial to society.  

I’m a complete waste of space, live with my Granny at her place,
Sometimes I swear I’m just an alien, hidden, among the human race.
And i had to get me a lady to convince myself that’s not the case.
And I give my heart to her, because we met through the fates!

And the fates will tell me yet again, if she’s meant to be my wife,
Haven’t put a ring on **** yet, but I blame my ******* up life.
And if she was cheating on me, wouldn't even be confused.
I would get exactly why you did it, but my ego would still be bruised.