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OC Dec 2018
drawing a line is
often less effective than
alluding to it
  Dec 2018 OC
Benjamin
I was six, then—
six or seven—
on a swing set in
September, and
I’m beginning to
remember
how alone I was
that day:

the clouds were dull
eraser shavings,
the wind a hollow
“Hallelujah.”
I pumped my legs, and
at the apex,
I gained an angel-eye
perspective:

the jaws of autumn
clenched their teeth in-
to my sternum,
popped a hole and
stole the summer from
my bloodline,
left a chill inside
my soul;

I’m taking all of this
for granted.
I spell disaster
with my left hand,
I sign “Messiah” with
my right;

and in the arrogance of
twenties, I think
the loneliness has left me,
I think we all don’t
grow up empty,
I think the future
could be bright.
OC Nov 2018
My father can juggle words
as though they were multicolored *****
His hands move, confident and strong
drawing rhythm and structure
from thin air
launching upwards word after word

And those chase one another
in colorful and complex patterns
like dancing hummingbirds
one's beak kisses tail of the other
a necklace made of rhymes
that twirl and loop around and on
composing lines that draw
a verse, a verse, a pause

the wonder that unfolds
in front of my bewildered face
as syllables, vowels and consonants
conjure magic
from null - into existence
creating paintings with no cloth
a symphony sans instruments

and I fill my own lungs with laughter
and joyfully applaud
my eyes are spangled by the stars
that without knowing or trying
day after day
he plucks down from the sky
for me
Comments:

"a necklace made of rhymes" - in the original language, that is a play on words. Rhymes can be translated as "beads" and necklace as "a stream of".

"composing lines that draw  a verse, a verse, a pause" - only similar in spirit to the original. Verse can also mean "home", the equivalent of pause can mean "space".

Written for my father's 60'th birthday. Don't tell him yet, you'll spoil the surprise...
OC Nov 2018
Today
I savored my own killing

I could've done so
at the twilight of my days
while I dose off
on a creaking rocking chair
my old lean limbs entangling down
my crooked joints melded to the arm rests
my heavy head resting on my collarbone
oblivious as I
mercifully approach from the back
gently stepping on the tube
leading oxygen to my dying body
watching as my breath become heavy
as my blocked throat wheeze in exhaustion
as my stressed lungs finally collapse
as I quietly yield to sleep.

I  could've done so
sometime tomorrow or yesterday
As I lay asleep on my back
snoring as usual
in an instant I'll roll over
and be on top of myself
clasping at my mouth and nose
pressing my full body weight
as I jolt awake, panicked and confused
my arm randomly flailing around
torn prayer flags swooped by a hurricane
my fingers digging into the flesh of my arms
attempting to pull me apart
until finally
my stubborn grip overcomes
and defeated I dim onto stillness
save for a twitch here or there.

I chose to do so
in my youth
as the texture of a heavy rope
grazes and bruises the skin on my neck
while I send a chilling smile at myself
from across the room
pulling a handle
that drops the floor beneath my feet
accelerating for the first time
relishing the hissing air
the absence of gravity
catching with my eyes my penetrating gaze
older than I am
full of grief, fatigue, and divination
cut by the cracking rope
torn like my snapped neck
with a hallow sound
much less revolting than I thought
watch me dangling like
a ragged pendulum
a grotesque puppet
an unripe miscarriage
feeling but a slight pinch of regret
for never knowing
this moment
OC Nov 2018
Nights like this
make me want to drown in you
to feel your surging body
flooding over me as the tides
rising and crushing down
to **** in your salt
and scorch my lungs
hot and wet
raging and rocking me about
I plunge into your ocean
lost, blind and blurred
sinking like a stone
floating like a feather
gently rocking in your darkest depth
on muffled, distant thunders
conceding
to the frailness of oblivion
wrecked
from the  calm of this abyss I am
sung
like foam onto your shores
Had our first storm of the season the night before
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