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392 · Feb 2016
Pretty gritty
Ryan Nyberg Feb 2016
If beauty will be this world's superhero
Who will save human race from chasing it?
It will all become clear when end comes reeling
We're killing what we did not help to build

With every word of critique we establish
Ourselves within ourselves
But nothing more
We hurt like we have right to be so savage
We sting as if we don't leave scars at all.
391 · Jul 2014
cage
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
does anyone need
what i write on this page
probably not
unless i'm Nicholas Cage.
im a funny one
388 · May 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg May 2016
i thought life would be easy
then you came around
i quickly fell off cloud 9
and hit the ground.

I believed knights were real and
i just might meet the one
i thought life would be like a dream
but
then you came around.

in my broken heart there is no light
every day like new it used to ignite
seasons change and days go by, I
wish i'd never looked into your eyes.
387 · May 2017
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg May 2017
i dont know how to feel
i dont know what to do
i dont know your face even
though i thought i knew you.

i am choking on smoke
we are equally broke
and now i am divided in two.
383 · Apr 2015
30 seconds
Ryan Nyberg Apr 2015
lift your head to the sun
feel the warmth and the cold
lift your arms to the sky
and feel sold.
you have never been free
you depend on all the
people round and about
people off stage tonight
people playing their roles
people crying near poles.
lift your head to the stars
it's a beautiful wander
it will start with light rain
but end in deadly thunder.
it will start a good book
end with twist and a hook
it will take you away from the best of the days.
you depend on the others
what they do what they say
you depend,its your air
it's a dragon you slay.
**** it now
cut the ropes
fly away from these shores.
379 · Nov 2015
M.
Ryan Nyberg Nov 2015
M.
You feel like the sun
So hot and im melting
You look like the ocean
So boundless and tempting

Just like cold air
I feel you
Like rain you wash my smiles
In your tides im caught up
After walking for miles
Ryan Nyberg Jun 2015
i'll build a bridge and you'll cross over
And when it rains- i'll be your cover.
I'll build a house and hide you in it
and when there's pain - i'll be your limit.
363 · Oct 2015
#1
Ryan Nyberg Oct 2015
#1
His eyes are oceans and I drown in his gaze every night
His voice - my motions, my emotios and my light.
His movements hypnotise me,
I cant look away
Every word he says is binding
I am led astray.
His smile's spell casting, charming, mesmerising
His figure Lean, so confident so tough
My knees go weak around him,
His touch's so surprising
I think this is how people define love.
He holds you still and all you dare to do
Is breath evenly, steadily, rarely,
Shaking through and through.
358 · Jan 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2016
today i wasnt happy i woke up.
in fact, my phone screamed ****** ****** and awoke me.
and so it brought me back to life
to my reality.
it wish it were my dreams that'd haunt me.
not a nightmare but beautiful lie.
M was with me, he kissed me
he was kind.
M was there, by my side, for some time
he was tender and loving
i missed him.
i though i had forgotten about him
i believed he had gone with the smoke
now that i am awake
it's apparent
he cannot go away for too long.
if you ask me what'd happened to trigger
these emotions and visions and pain
just a casual, unthoughtful question
by a curious, immature friend.
now i feel very disoriented
im uncertain about where to go
all directions've messed up on my map and
i keep stumbling on ******-white snow.
Ryan Nyberg Dec 2015
this one's to say i love you
now and ever
this one's to say my lies
are only fever.

im drunk and this might not make any sense
but i will drop the veil,
abandon the pretence
and say i love you,
not to you of course
i dont think i am strong enough
to face remorse

you boast, you lie, you're confident as ****.
im awkward, i am pretty, i'd say very drunk.

you're happy, you dont bother
why should i?
oh yeah, that's right
i am a female
i am never fine.
im always overthinking
always analysing
the words you say
the nouns, the verbs
what you're disguising

The chains you put on me
dragging me down
the pain you caused
is eating me alive
but i stay calm

i need you
please oh be with me
oh please
i know i am not good enough
i'd rather you would **** me
make it easy.

i scratch my head
and pull my hair
i run my fingers down my chest
i think of you
i think of us
i drown, i crumble
im your chess.

your name
i wish i could just say your name aloud
and not be scared
i want to scream your name
but i wont yet.
i'd wait
i'd wait until the very end
and say your name under my breath
i hate this.
i hate every moment, every second
but i want "us".  
but i love you
so i am fine
and merry christmas.
354 · Jul 2014
a raw
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
You want your freedom
Want your *****
You make my fairytales come loose.
Apologies dont mean a thing to both of us
You re still unfair and I still jeopardise your trust.
I want to be with you see that you care
You only talk, you choose truth never dare.
I want a first dance, want your crying eyes
To shine so bright and be clear like blue skies
When I am in the whitest dress…say yes.
My life is not a fairytale
Of that I’m sure.
But I believed you d make it one
You d make it pure.
I’d fall down to your feet
I’d hug your knees
I’d beg and swear I love you
With such ease.
In love there is no space for pride
I say im sorry and I never hide.
What hurt the most that you don’t understand
how much it hurts and how hard to pretend
To make my peace with what I always feared.
To know what could have been and realise.. I saw- it disappeared.
You made me stronger I have ever been
But now im so weak, and my hope s so thin.
i want to make you feel like i am not forever
eternity seems to be not so long.
i want you to keep what we have
and treasure
what we will have as long as love goes on.
353 · Dec 2015
credits. M.
Ryan Nyberg Dec 2015
stop the camera
let the credits roll
all your nasty things
took their toll.
i believed you would
change or that was love
little did i know
you were just an ****.
i was nice and kind
i believed in you
tried to change your mind
and my point of view.
little did i know
you were just an ****
little did you show
there was never "us".
i was so in love
i was oh so blind
maybe i am still
but i feel the light
shining through my eyes
closed, and then sealed -shut
i believed you were
simply bold and blunt.
all insults i would
take and bear and wait
i was oh so patient
hoping to get laid.
little did i know
glad now it is clear
only one you loved
you saw in the mirror.
352 · Oct 2015
homeillness
Ryan Nyberg Oct 2015
If home's where the heart is
Then I must be heartless
This place still feels alien
And my soul in crisis.
I change countries and people
I change sceneries, towns
Different captures and tongues
Different 'hi"s and 'goodbye's
Nothing's ever the same
Apart from my own name.
Apart from how i feel
In a foreigner's skin.
351 · Apr 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Apr 2016
i wasnt very kind to you
i know
i pushed you into freshly fallen snow.
i laughed and i was cruel to your heart
i stomped on it, i crashed all hopes you had.

i never understood what i was doing;
i never stopped to think if i were wrong.
the wind led me with the force of a bullet
it made me so insensitive so long.

i wasnt very kind to you
i know
i wasnt fair, i didnt care
to show;
that deep down i was burning with desire
to kiss your lips, your fingertips
are fire.

i wanted to be with you every second.
when im awake, asleep, alive, or buried under
in my peaceful beginning you're a thunder
and i loved you so eagerly i reckoned.

im sorry i was ******* you, im sorry
i thought i was the author of the best
the most romantic, to die for love story
im dead inside : i watch you're laid to rest....
349 · Dec 2017
perfect
Ryan Nyberg Dec 2017
he doesnt mind the pills beside my bed;
and i never wished i'd loved someone else instead;
we both are parts of one whole, left and right
to my deaf ears- he's hearing;
to his blindness i am sight.

he doesnt mind me screaming when the clock stops;
he wipes the tears off of my face with his;
i'd never thought i'd know what it is like to not be hopeless
i never thought i'd call what i feel bliss.

he takes my hand and guides me to a place
where i have never been before;
and at his pace
i notice every detail, every layer to the core
the air i breathe in is enough- i need no more.

he doesnt mind the pills beside my bed
he looks so closely at the noose around my neck;
he listens closely when the wine invades my head
he is the warmth when i am cold and i cant feel
a thing;
he loves me.
he adores me.
he's not real...
348 · Jan 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2016
I dont believe in ghosts
I dont believe in torture
My faith lies deep inside
Inside the light I nurture.

In shadows I hide well
Am quiet, am no shameful
Am brave, rarely regretful
In shadows I hide well.

I dont believe in life
But death aint my religion
Inside black holes I find
My safety, self imprisoned.

When I am old and my
Hair is the shade of ashes
And my old look refuses to
Surrender to all washes

My thoughts will fall asleep
And constant noise will quiet
I won't care for the world
I won't care if my nights end.

My cage will stay the same
The walls will still surround me
I won't believe in ghosts
Even not those I can see.

The more I look the more
I notice in reflection
My perfect imperfection
The more I look I see.

The end will be my closure
Ill rest I'll lay my head
Nail down my bed, and change my posture
At death im now adept
347 · May 2016
His name
Ryan Nyberg May 2016
My life
Is burning in a fire;
Created by my
Hopes
And
Endless
Love.
346 · Jul 2014
oh mother
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
Is this what mother calls 'the purest love'
when you curse your child like he is no god.
you bring him down and make sure they know fully well
you regret giving birth to them.
that's how my mother treated me my whole not so long life
now that i'm lying breathless, pale so lifeless
she oh finally seems like she does mind.
and still she looks and says:
"what a disgrace! you could have taken pills!
save what you had of a such pretty face! "
little she knows i hear every word.
i hear her sigh, her heart has already burnt
all memory of me and what i left
is no longer alive. she took my life but got away with theft.
oh mother! why couldn't you love me!
i tried to clear the skies above your head!
oh mother! why couldn't you trust me
forgive me my mistakes. but you cut the last thread.
my hollow body's hanging on a noose.
my legs are finally seem skinny,
clothes are loose.
i finally have that light in my eyes
oh, woe is me, to shine i had to die.
oh mother, i prayed please don't torture me
but you had different view on what daughter should be
if only i was loved and understood
maybe i would be happier than i thought i ever could.
346 · May 2017
unfin...
Ryan Nyberg May 2017
you're not enough
i hear them say
they call my bluff
pronounce insane.
you're not enough
i sense them think
i see through their eyes
even at fastest blink.
you're not enough
and your voice's not a song
no one ever asked me
need i a "sing-along"?
345 · Sep 2015
4 minutes
Ryan Nyberg Sep 2015
im burning down the bridges
im taking down the castles
what used to be so strong
and seemed so massive
no longer stands so confidently still
no longer lasts, no longer fortress, was not will.
I opened my eyes and saw light once more
what used to hurt badly,
now i come back for more.
no longer cry
no longer scared
prepared.

so far i've missed you with every word
so far i've missed you with every dream
im burning down the bridges
what they seem.
341 · May 2017
Silence
Ryan Nyberg May 2017
sometimes it's healthy to just sit in silence
focus on your body and your thoughts
notice sounds around you when no body
is tearing you apart or holding you by throat.
341 · Jan 2023
22
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2023
22
in a concrete box that you once called home
with nobody there, in silence, lights gone
you start to question “why am i, what for”
in a concrete box with no windows or doors. 

You think you’ll never sleep again or smile, 
your heart is now forever in exile. 
you search for answers trying to grasp air,
the reminiscence of what seems was never there

among the memories that might as well be dreams,
you wonder if anything is what it seems. 
you feel cold, out of nowhere comes a gust of wind
“breathe of fresh air” you hope
is there a crack in the concrete? 

your lungs expand, you open your eyes wide
you clench your fists
a chance no fight or flight
Then wind sweeps you off of your feet
you fall,
your body feels the chill of concrete floor
you can taste blood though you're not bleeding
your faith is running low, your hope receding. 

yet you find strength and pull yourself back up
you swallow, you are ready to attack. 
you wonder “surely, this is not the end. 
for suffering, for pain i am not meant”.

another gust of wind starts to build up
tears fill your eyes “please dont be a setback”
you whisper under your breath and you let it
lift yourself high so you can see the room
black and grey space, a prison cell of doom.
 
and suddenly like fog, the wind dissolves.
just as it came from nowhere, there it goes. 
and you fall harder, breaking all your bones. 
now you see it, you can smell your blood

you feel defeated, deafened by the thud
of your own body slammed against the floor
you cry “no more, i beg, no more”.

I cannot get through yet another storm; 
I have no faith, no will, no sails and no brawn.
I am no longer me - just a faint shadow
of what i could have been but i am shattered. 

then out of darkness, from where the winds came
hot puff of air, warm spirit of good days
wraps arms around your shoulders, helps you up
it gently places you back on your feet and stops. 

it penetrates your soul and calms your mind
it’s soft, it’s lovable, its kind.
it dries your tears and you can see
alas, there is a door in front of me.
341 · May 2017
Florian
Ryan Nyberg May 2017
I love my heart to the bone
Awaking my sadness
To it's dying song.

I cry my eyes to the skull
So much so even when I am joyous
My smile is dull.

I walk my feet till they bleed;
Water and cherish ache
And all it seeds;

I loved my heart to the core
To the back of my spine
Digging wounds always sore;
And I'll never stop cradling the faith
One day you will love me til death..
340 · Jul 2014
can't stop won't stop
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
i love it how you make me laugh by being you

i love it that you  make me be so serious when i dont know what in this life i have to do

i found my best friend you have always been so close to me

i found my soulmate who would unconditionally let me be.

now when im learning to believe again

its hard almost impossible and breathing seems to be in vain

but look at you and such innocent smile

i feel so bad taking all that away from you

i hope one day i ll prove to you im worth it

but you might regret things you didnt do
337 · Mar 2017
A survey
Ryan Nyberg Mar 2017
trying to find myself- i lost myself;
giving away assistance- didnt notice
that I needed help;
trying to cope with pain-
neglected love;
have you ever done one or more of the above?
336 · Jul 2014
everyday
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
sometimes i am
sometimes I'm not
sometimes my mind tights into knots
sometimes i live
sometimes survive
sometimes somedays i take a scarf
i wrap it round my neck and hold
the ends until your arms unfold
it didn't happen the last time
i thought i died, but now I'm fine.
sometimes i shake
and let it go
sometimes i laugh and carry on
sometimes somedays
i meet new me
and at that point i let it be
and then i see my eyes shine bright
when i don't see of you a sight.
336 · Oct 2015
#3
Ryan Nyberg Oct 2015
#3
i held your hand when you exhaled
and the world stopped as you paused time
i cried my heart out as i pondered
and reminisced of yours and mine.
no more weak ticking in dead silence
no more confused insistent clamour
i grew to hold in bitter drama
where once was peace now chaos, harmar.
334 · Jan 2017
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2017
my loneliness is nothing more than thirst
my aching heart- no more than biting hunger;
just like a dog i run to every stranger
but i appear to be a wolf to every hunter.

No one will hear me howl at night,
im silent.
my cry is deaf, my cry is dry,
non violent;
so very few see diamonds in my eyes
those frozen treasures are tears in disguise.

they say keep your head up
and protect faith;
but where am i to seek this endless strength
when all around me grey, and melting, quiet
whereas i long for some sunlight and a riot.
331 · Nov 2017
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Nov 2017
you have the most beautiful smile;
the softest voice
of all i know;
your tears- are liquid gold;
your dreams inspire;
and i wish it was my hand you would hold.
329 · May 2015
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg May 2015
my love turned into dust
my heart is coal
i shook the world off me
and grabbed the soil
i ran to keep the earth moving and spinning
the end of this was end of my beginning.
pathetic
hear me?
i speak words of truth
pathetic
you with ugly useless youth.
with time the beauty fades
your mind comes reeling
so when you run to contribute to the earth spinning
you will be thrown off into space
forgotten
love turned to dust
heart black, hard,
and bones rotten.
329 · May 2015
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg May 2015
this is a very lonely world
we're born alone and  lone we're learnt
we're bred alone
alone we live
we search alone
the ground beneath.
alone we pray, alone believe
alone we stay alone we leave.
a single person you and i
one match, one candle, single eye.
this is a very lonely world
for those who hope to say right words
we grow old lonely
in the aftermath
we are still single soldiers
walking different paths.

your friends wont remember
your name in a day
your parents will live on
a niddle in stock of hay.
Just for the record im not religious
328 · May 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg May 2016
this one will be indeed the final one
my friends mentioned the sadness in my eyes
i thought i'd hidden.
but alas they sensed there must be a man
who by i was so deeply bitten.
and i believed i had disguised the agony
the fire's flames i thought i'd covered well enough
turns out while i was getting burnt so violently
they saw the blaze, got burnt but called my bluff.
im writing and my fingers bleed so eagerly
everything i have held locked inside me for so long
finds ways to escape armour i've built, now i see
his touch, his words have sinister, dark tone.
I thank the fate, and God, and my decisions
i thank the bravery i had to see him then
i got last kiss goodbye and watched him leave me
im grateful for the time that we had spent.
this one will be indeed the final one
i will make sure i wont relapse again
and if there is, just like me here, someone
who thinks that it is harmless to pretend
and hope they'll change their mind
their ways, their days
you're in for years of torment, sleepless nights
you aint a princess and there are no knights.
328 · Jul 2014
i see no changes
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
i dont need fancy house or a super cool car

i dont need diamond rings or the stars from the sky.

just your smile, your laugh

will be more than enough.

we re struggling we re fighting

and we hope for the best

noone knows what will happen

we dont know when we ll rest.

as long as we end up being by each others side forever

id keep going through the storm until i cant remember

my name and purpose why i came into this world

and your name will be only word

i know.
328 · May 2017
Flo
Ryan Nyberg May 2017
Flo
You never promised anything
but i built castles from your sand;
and it was never what you did
but all you said.

we never saw each other in each other's eyes
we never promised to be present
not break hearts;
in love and death
in sickness, health
i took you before knew your name.
the world i made up at first sight of you
now just isnt the same.
326 · Jun 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jun 2016
i thought i got what i wanted
why do i feel like a ghost?
yet im haunted
there's no place for my soul to rest
there's no place for my heart to beat
i feel im doing my very best
yet im failing, i suffer defeat.
i though i got what i wanted
turns out i lost the little i had
never gained happines i was after
now i fight with myself in my head.  
and no cigarette will make it easy
and no wine will release me from pain
now im on the road too hard to travel
where i am i dont want to remain.
where im from there's no more room for my dreams
no more space for my ego, my thoughts
where do i go, what door do i knock on
where they'll take my pure love and my faults.
Ryan Nyberg Oct 2015
like tsunami
it swallows you whole
like a car crash it breaks you
like a gun
leaves a hole

like a knife cuts your throat
like a noose leaves a bruise
like heartbreak
makes you ache
***** your soul
but you crawl

you cant walk
no strength even to talk
every breath takes it all
needles build
and destroy .
324 · Sep 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Sep 2016
last time we talked it didn't end so well;
and since i've gone through waters high, and hell;
since then i've grown, i've learnt,
could be i have recovered;
last time we talked something inside me died,
but something better since then i've discovered.
no longer waiting for a word from you, a sign;
i don't wake up mid night to loud voices inside;
last time we talked it might not ended well;
enchanted, fooled me for a while, broke the spell;
like ghost you haunt me, live my days beside me;
though i ignore, and try to push aside thee;
you come down and you pour like summer rain
you mess my hair up, tangle thoughts inside my brain;
you bury me and fill my lungs with sand;
your blizzards never knew how to withstand.
one day i will wake up, your name'll sound unfamiliar;
one day your face will be a face of just another passing stranger
last time we talked was last time i felt fearful
now i feel safe, outside the zone of danger.
322 · Feb 2015
.toidi
Ryan Nyberg Feb 2015
i wandered amongst lifeless souls
where were my thoughts i called my home
where i left love i called the past
and what i found, forget i must.
i ve battled fears and unknown dreams
seems like i havent slept in weeks
you were the best thing in my life
until you said i aint the right.
person for you and i should leave
wipe clean the feelings that i breed
i want to go, i want to stay
where i am found i would remain
no more sweet words and cruel jokes
you wont cut deeper than my thoughts
as soon as you have left my head
i ll start to plan what lies ahead.
as soon as you have left my heart
stopped being my life's the biggest part
you have become my own mistake
my one regret, a promise i won't ever break.
sometimes i reckon its my turn
to suffer like the rest of us
then i see my self turn to dust
along with bridges that i ve burnt
the happier you get the worse
my love's become my only curse
my friend's become the death of me
how could i foolishly believe
that someone would be true to us
someone would clean my dark grey skies.
i was so wrong, that 's why it burns
i wish for one day we switched turns.
i would be happy i am free
and you would die inside and bleed.
your eyes would fill with smoke and ash
your ears would ring, and system crash.
you wouldnt stand straight
wouldnt care,
before you go to sleep, so scared
you would be crying all night long
your tears turn red
your limbs go cold.
then you would go back to yourself
all happy free in love with else.
and i dont care, and i dont mind
you re something i will leave behind.
321 · Jul 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2016
i feel like im trapped in a cage
and the lock's getting tougher
as i rave in sheer rage
i feel like im wearing a vest
that is too tight to breathe in,
as it crushes my chest.
the hight never scared me at all
and i've always looked up
traced those firm concrete walls
all the way to the skies
i mistook them for paths
guiding me to the heaven
while hell was where i was.
I could never imagine
how much i'd fall for your gaze
how i'd search for your figure
in this foreign thick haze.
I could never envision
i'd get to taste your stiff lips
wrap my arms round your body
and let go of my shield.
you fall silent for months
nonchalant and unworried
whilst my days are now one
my steps no longer solid.
and im thinking i could
just get rid of you now.
block your way back into
my life.
but if you disappear,
everything i live for
all my hopes, expectations
stay behind the closed door
on the same side as you.
319 · Jan 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2016
Please hold my chair while I tie my noose.
It won't be accidental, it is something I choose.
So im holding the rope, round my neck like a scarf
And im looking around, round myself 'sif on wharf.
Far away in the sea, lie my hopes, expectations
'cause I buried them with
My dear friends and my patience.
Kindness can be mistaken
For a weakness mistook
But im done with being perfect
sliced my friends with a hook.
They were nice when they needed
My assistance or warmth
Now they re lying, not breathing
They've awoken my storms.
I took rusty old metal hook
'fore it got covered in blood
It even shone in some places
Under sun's heavy light
Now I don't think it'll ever
See the daylight again
I threw betraying weapons
Into sea during rain
There lie lifeless their bodies
Mutilated, in parts
They lie, empty their minds.
Boy, they should have thought twice.
I won't stand the rejection
Im not good at ignoring
In a search for perfection
Act was beautifully gory.
Judge as much as you want
And be scared of my words
But If you stab my back
Please hold my chair while I tie my noose.
Dying is not my fate, it's something I choose.
So im holding the rope, round my neck like a scarf
And im looking around, round myself 'sif on wharf.
Far away in the sea, lie my hopes, expectations
'cause I buried them with
My dear friends and my patience.
Kindness can be mistaken
For a weakness mistook
But im done with being perfect
sliced my friends with a hook.
They were soft when they needed
My assistance or warmth
Now they re laying, not breathing
They've awoken my storms.
I took rusty old metal hook
'fore it got covered in blood
It even shone in some places
Under sun's heavy light
Now I don't think it'll ever
See the daylight again
I threw betraying weapons
Into sea during rain
There lie lifeless their bodies
Mutilated at parts
They lay empty their mind
Boy, they should have thought twice.
I won't stand the rejection
Im not good at ignoring
Always reach for perfection
Act was beautifully gory.
Judge as much as you want
And be scared of my words
But If you stab my back
I'll interrupt your pulse.
316 · Mar 2017
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Mar 2017
If I had all the treasures of the world
Money, silver and pure gold
If I had all the diamonds and the coal
For 5 more hours to a day I'd trade it all.
For more love in our deeds
For more faith in beliefs
For purity in dirt
For words said that don't hurt
For travels and adventure
For dignity and virtue
For music ending wars
For endless even scores
For more life in our eyes
I'd pay required price.
316 · Jan 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2016
You make me feel big
Bigger than life
And I love you for that.
You make me the happiest
Give what I'd never had
And I love you for that.

You make my heart beat
Race at the speed of sound.
You bring colour to world
Now it doesn't taste bland
And I love you for that.

In my darkness you're light
On all black stains you're white
In the chaos you're calm.
On my neck lucky charm.
And I love you for that.

You will smile at me
When I fail, or stumble
As if it's supposed to be
Creased and broken and crumbled.
And I love you for that.

When I feel like a duckling
Not the best of its kind
When I feel out of place
When I try run and hide
You comfort me with love
You ease my distress
You make me get up and show up
With you I fear a lot less
And I love you for that.

You are stars leading the way
When clouds divert me astray
And I wish that you could see
If you were real, I'd love still.
315 · Feb 2015
Tea time
Ryan Nyberg Feb 2015
your very best
my very worst
your heart is healed
my pipes have burst
youre warm and dry
im soaking wet
youre home and full
im rarely fed.
you're bright and well
im tired and coy
youre confident
i am destroyed.
what happened
nothing i reply
i am ecstatic
i am fine.
315 · Jul 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2016
think back to when somebody broke your heart
and i immediately thought about the times
we spent apart.
and instantly i went back to the place
outside train station, lone, exhausted, drained.
when i awaited you for hours, prayed you'd come
indifferent, restraining, murky, calm
you said: 'yeah, i'll catch you next time".
my feelings take me back every night
to when i saw you first across the room
and thought i'd never like all what you had
and now, to avoid all you've never touched i'm doomed.
think back to when somebody crashed your hopes
and made you feel like you're a worthless idiot.
you always wanted what i never got
and i will never love what you are not.
313 · Jul 2014
typewriter
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
4 am but I'm here
where could i disappear?
4 am and I'm still
under your spell and will.

soon will come the sunlight
and the nature wake up
still I'm going to ask
what am i doing here?

4 am and I'm drunk
but on my own self harm.
where could i disappear
from under your wicked will..
312 · Apr 2016
so i had a date...
Ryan Nyberg Apr 2016
i recognised the song that you put on
and thought i love this song, i'll sing along!
but after the first note i hit i thought
"wait up a minute, you cant sing you idiot."
so i sat quietly and waited 'til it ended;
that you did NOT hear my flat note
oh you pretended.
and i believed i had ******* up all chances
for moonlit walks and singable romances.
but you were maybe drunk
or maybe stupid
or maybe, i hope so, struck by a cupid
you didnt judge, you didnt even comment
you let it pass- horrific, silly moment.
and i am not the perfect one, you see
and i am not the most of what could be
and yes i spent all evening slurring words
mixing two languages, i wish you spoke my first.
it was so awkward and embarrassing i thought
and flirt -is not something i'd ever master,
but after this- our horrible disaster-
im so love, oh i am so in love.
312 · Jan 2017
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg Jan 2017
There was this boy
And there was this girl
For him she was carnal lust
For her he was the whole world.

He looked at her - never noticed
She struggled to look away,
For him she was unimportant
While to her he- drop of faith.

Through debris following beams
Of what life's not, but it seems;
We wander, most getting lost
But so determined to find
A soulmate, despite the  cost.

Alone we walk along sidewalks
Paths laid by others like us
Seeking and calling for someone
Who'd hear the hertz of our cries.

Clearing the driveways
Of snow, of dead leaves
Spraying with water fake lawns
To keep facade what it seems;

At last so tired and empty
At last but never at least
You find the one whose heart fills in
The beat your heart gently skips.
Ryan Nyberg Jul 2014
I prayed to the moon to raise the tides,
I begged the soil to bury my pain
I cried to the heaven “Please, heal his deep bites”
If only I knew you ran deep in my veins.
Scratched my skin ‘til I bled,
Walked my feet till they’re dead;
Broke my bones, pierced my heart
Took my sanity, you
And sent me back to the start.
It might have been the sun
Might have been distance or planes
Whatever it is I would walk it in days.
This place is hopeless,
And now I feel so worthless,
Giving me time to forget
You’re staying calm and so voiceless.
I don’t know where you hide,
Or how you spend my nights
Let me go, let me out
No longer want to be yours.
Give me back my own god,
Return strength to my bones.
I get so desperate sometimes
I don’t want to inhale
The same air that you breath
Wish to forget your full name.
I welcomed Death in my arms
Believing it Was my friend
And I still think it is so
To a certain extent extent.
309 · May 2016
Untitled
Ryan Nyberg May 2016
they say if you want to be silent
to run away and disappear with time;
you probably ache to be noticed, seen, acknowledged
you're likely to want to be simply found.

the more you long for something
more you venture
into the darkness following its trace;
the more you long for something
more adventure
you face,
as well as being misplaced.
309 · May 2017
Florian
Ryan Nyberg May 2017
Fairytales aren't meant to come true;
They are engraved into books' pages
There is no way for them to flee
From hundred thousand cages.

Many great writers burnt the scripts
To love that's never ending
Trying to make them come to life
But what's the use pretending?

I let it slip my sanity and honest,
I thought something is different in the world of  mine.
Alas the only difference between me and century long fairytales
Is lack of time.
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